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How I Recognized Something That Was Always There

When seems to fall apart, focus on what's intact in your life. The rest will fall into place.

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How I Recognized Something That Was Always There
Umadevi Ramesh

My dearest Huti,

They say nothing is perfect, no-one has it all, but what if the one thing that you have in your life is enough to make your life just right?

Once a little girl made a friend, her first friend, the innocent soul never thought of an end to that friendship but alas she was not in a fantasy alas this was the real world and it left her innocence with a crack waiting to be mended.

Now with shoes a few sizes bigger, the little girl wasn't little anymore but was it really the shoes or that crack left untended?

Outside her safe space, outside the unconditional love she received from home, she witnessed betrayal for the first time, dishonesty for the first time and heartbreak for the first time.

unable to create a home outside her home, she was frustrated, frustrated at people, friends, “best friends” who just left. That is not home.

The crack became bigger and bigger until it shattered. Her innocence broken by people, friends, “best friends”.

In this fake world did she learn to live, just had to be unseen, camouflaged in this world to survive.

Fake did she become to be part of the so called real world, so called humanity.

Just have to play the part, she kept telling herself, until, she met a girl, a red haired, sassy, weird fuckin girl.

Oh did she try hard to keep her guards up, that fake mask she had on forever, the mask that suffocated yet protected her, was now hard to keep on.

This one, this one was different. She challenged her in ways the girl would not expect. The broken pieces were slowly coming together, slowly being brought together by her, her best friend.

They did things that no-one would label innocent, but their relationship, their relationship was innocent, pure, and unbreakable.

To my best friend,

you intimidated me when I first met you, first week of college, left me all vulnerable, vulnerable in a good way.

there are these layers to you that I have slowly unraveled in these past few months and each one had an element of surprise, each one is beautiful in its own way.

you are kind, the kindest I know, no amount of sass is going to hide that.

the way you love your family, your dogs, me and everyone else around you is just beautiful to witness.

you are the bigger person, even with people who do not deserve you and your patience, being always the better person, you make me admire you.

you are soft yet strong which makes you love unconditionally yet not get broken by anyone.

you are positive, positive about everything, grateful for everything around you, appreciative of what God has gifted you with. This rare quality of yours has finally broken my facade, my mask.

I was vulnerable, remember? I feared you would break my mask and you did but I am left with no fear for I know this time, this is the real world where my best friend would be a part of it forever.

- Ahuti Joshi Goyal, I pronounce us soulmates for life. Happy birthday my love.

You are all I need whenever I go down that dark hole. I just have to remember that I have someone to get me out, just have to see the bright side of my life.

I have no reason to complain, my friend, because I have you and like I said, you are that one special thing in my life to make it just right, just perfect.

-yours

Ums

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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