Those who don't live with the day to day distress of a mental illness tend to think of mental illness in a singular sense. Depression is automatically connected to self harm. Bipolar disorder to mood swings. Anorexia to hating food. Anxiety to staying in bed all day. People who don't fight to function on a daily basis get the safety in assuming that people with a mental illness are fighting just one battle at a time and not fighting the NUMEROUS symptoms that a mental disorder entails.

I have social anxiety. No, this doesn't mean that the only struggle in my life is removing myself from my room (although that is a struggle; I have a very comfortable bed) to go out a socialize with people. I hate being in rooms filled with people I don't know. I hate walking past people I don't know on the street. I hate answering the phone. I hate going shopping by myself. I hate meeting new people. I hate talking unexpectedly in class. I hate having social anxiety. I hate the gasping, crippling effect that it has on my body. But I hate being called shy the most. I'm not shy. I'm actually a pretty loud open person when my anxiety allows. For years teachers and professors have told me to speak up in class. "It's evident from your homework and papers that you're smart and studious, why don't you speak up and share your ideas with the class?" BECAUSE I WILL LITERALLY SHAKE AND SWEAT AND GASP AND DIE PROBABLY THAT'S WHY. If I was shy I wouldn't come to you after class and you questions. If I was shy I wouldn't snicker or mumble sarcastic jokes or comments to the people around me. If I were shy I would avert my eyes every time someone looked me in the eyes.

Last year I had a professor who had a whole page of Moodle dedicated to participation. And half our grade was participation. HAHAH GUESS WHO DIDN'T GET THAT 4.0! You may ask, "Well, Liz, can't you just go to your professors and explain to them that you have anxiety?" Yeah. I could. If I didn't break out in sweat and start shaking at the very thought of it. Going to class isn't a problem for me. I actually like going to class (most days; again I have a very comfortable bed) and learning. It's just hard to go to class when the professor makes it a mission to make every single student talk every single day. The pressure of being expected to talk makes my anxiety spike. I will warm up to a class and I will start speaking. But it has to be done on my own terms or the likelihood of me not dying every time I enter the classroom door is very very low.

In short, hey friends, if you know someone who is quiet and timid don't call them shy right off the bat. Make sure there's not something deeper going on before you label someone as a shy person. Get to know them and their mind a little more before slapping on a label.