Could you imagine the audacity someone has coming up to you at a party to start a conversation? How about being set up on a blind date and not having the option to Google every shred of information about the person before you get dinner? The fact is we live in this new millennium that is so consumed with technology that it has not only changed our ways of doing things, but has altered our normalcies in communicating with one another, and completely shattered the concept of dating and its expectations for our generation.
Cell phones allow us to be contactable at all times, social media lets you virtually know a person without having ever met them, and dating apps have allowed us to find suitable partners for our specific desires similar to online shopping, what we want just being a click away.
In a study conducted by Pew Research Center, one in four teenagers reported having dated or hooked-up with someone who they initially met online, being via dating app or social media. Think about that. These technological advances haven’t been around for nearly more than 10 years, and already a quarter of youth find it normal and natural to begin a relationship through them. Imagine the confusion when you bring your significant other to your next family party and your grandmother asked how you two met — and your response is, "it all started when I liked his/her Instagram post and I decided to direct message him/her."
I understand we live in an ever-evolving society, but I never imagined the way we date would change. How we get directions to a destination or doing research for a paper, yes, but not the way we’re supposed to find love.
Normally when we get attention from a crush or someone we find attractive, we get this unsettling feeling in our stomach, also known as “the butterflies.” This feeling is due to a chemical hormone being released from our brains indicating a sense of excitement. It used to be triggered from a subtle smile from across the room or from someone coming up to you at a bar asking to buy you a drink. However, with the creation of social media and dating apps, studies have shown that dopamine, “the butterflies” hormone, is now being released by the random alertness from notifications. It could be from noticing a new Snapchat received from someone you like on your phone’s dashboard, or even a new Instagram notification that someone liked your latest post. In the most recent technological advances to society’s dating game, getting a Tinder match alert is the newest high on the love excitement drug. It saddens me that the natural rush from dating and the feelings aligned with it used to be strictly from face-to-face interaction, but now are being done behind the screens of computers and phones.
The truth is you really have no idea who these people are. Finding anyone who you agreeably like one another’s pictures with on to meet and hook-up with seems like a pretty easy way to get hurt. We learn by the time we’re two to never go off with strangers, so why is talking to them online any different.
Our generation believes that with the creation of the internet and our best friend, Google, we can find anything on anyone; therefore, guaranteeing our safety. How naïve can we be? The television network, MTV, even has an entire series focusing on how trusting we’ve become and the dangers of it. Catfishing is even recognized by the Merriam Webster Dictionary, being defined as a person who sets up a false personal profile on a social networking site for fraudulent or deceptive purposes. If the Merriam Webster Dictionary is acknowledging it, then this is a term our society needs to be aware of.
A person can argue that these networks, apps, and dating sites are technological advancements that have made dating so much easier and convenient, perfect for our generation’s mentality of getting things done fast and efficiently. But do you want to suppress your love life to something that will just save you time to fit in a few extra Netflix episodes at the end of the week? If the answer is yes, your priorities are questionable.
The fact is we’ll never get to undo the creation of these social mediums, but it’s about time we stop feeding into and trusting them. They’ve completely brainwashed us and have taken away the innocence to one of the purest things we have left, love and the way we find it.
