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Snakes On A Playne

A literal snake was found in a local theater.

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Snakes On A Playne
Keaton.W

A SNAKE was set loose during a recent performance of the play, "4.48 Psychosis" at Fresno State this weekend. A LIVE SNAKE.

According to theatre patrons, all was well and good at the play until about halfway through the show when a LITERAL SNAKE slithered into the audience.

Apparently a woman at the show brought the serpent in her backpack and had not purchased a ticket for her scaly friend. Homeboy decided to dip halfway through the play, maybe he was triggered by the dark subject matter, or maybe he was just a slippery snek, but he was frolicking about between the seats.

An inside source tells me, "everyone stayed pretty quiet and just whispered to inform people that there was a snake on the loose. But once the lights came on at the end, people were shook."

Thirty year old theatergoer and thespian Steven Lee Weatherbee had this to say on the matter, "WHY DID SHE COME WITH A LIVE, UN-CAGED, UNATTENDED SNAKE".

Professional quesadilla connoisseur Chloe Quesada said about the snake incident, "I am highly considering never going to the theatre again."

Emilea Louise Paulson, backstage queen, said that she, "might fucking quit theatre after tonight."

Apparently a theatre employee tried to grab the snake, but was advised to instead call campus security or animal control.

According to theatergoers, the owner of the snake wandered back into the theater after the show saying that she had, "forgotten something."

People around said, "UH YEAH GIRL YOUR SNAKE."

You heard it here first folks. Don't you dare bring your damn snake to a play.

There are enough snakes sitting in the audience. We don't need any slithering around under the seats.

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