Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie defined a feminist as a “person who believes in the social, political and economic equality of the sexes.”Feminism is about empowering women to be strong and successful in life and to be equal to men. I discovered feminism at a young age and it felt good. Today my view on feminism is different because I was slut shamed by feminists last summer. Instead of expressing political or economical feminist issues, I began to focus on social feminism. Social media is a huge part of our lives whether it's on twitter, messaging or reading the news. Social media is all around us.
On social media, we have the need to post a picture of everything that we do. I saw a tweet recently of a magazine article telling celebrities such as Miley Cyrus, Kim Kardashian and Kylie Jenner to “cover up." It called them sluts and whores for showing skin, posing for an advertisement or wearing tight and revealing clothing. Yet, the same magazine posted pictures of Justin Bieber, Nick Jonas and Liam Hemsworth exposing certain areas calling them “hot” and “yummy.” Double standard, much? Most people would agree that it is a double standard—even hypocritical feminists.
It isn’t right that men are allowed to do certain things while women have to think twice about it before getting insulted. In society we tend to misuse the words “slut” or “whore.” As Ms. Norbury says in "Mean Girls," “You all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it okay for guys to call you sluts and whores.” A women is automatically a slut for posing in her bathing suit and posting it on Instagram, interacting with a man or sleeping with someone. Meanwhile, men who pose shirtless are gods. Men who sleep or interact with not one, but multiple women are considered “the man” and praised for doing so.
After being slut shamed by so called "feminists," I realized who these people actually were. I realized who I am and I reflected on my past when I slut shamed other women while calling myself a feminist. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost half a year now, and he mentions that people we mutually know slut shamed me behind my back.
Yes, I dated more than one man. Yes I had sexual relations with more than one man. Yes I have more than one friend who is man. Although I try to keep my life private, I am still considered a slut. The people who slut shamed me have absolutely no right to. They made the same decisions I did. Slut shaming doesn't make you a better feminist, it makes you a hypocrite.
Women should be able to express themselves without being called a slut or a whore. Women should be able to have fun and not worry about others judging them. Feminists preach that women need to be empowered and to feel good about themselves, but how is that possible if their actions caused them to have no self esteem? Females are taught that it's not appropriate to be sexual beings. Males, on the other hand, are not given the same lesson. What is reason for this? Aren’t we all human? All humans are females as an embryo until the y chromosome is released.
Another women have the tendency to dislike each other for their own actions. I've caught myself disliking a women for sleeping with someone or showing too much skin on the internet. When I do this, I stop myself immediately and remember who I am. I encourage my best friends to do what they want to do. I encourage them to have fun but to be safe. I always tell them to forget about the other people around them and worry about themselves—which is what every women should do. Every woman has the capability to love herself in a bathing suit and post it on social media. Every woman is able to satisfy her own needs without being slut shamed.
Even though I am a slut, I am proud to be one because it made me who I am today. It made me love myself more, and I'm not ashamed of anything I did. No woman should hate herself because another person does, no woman in the world should feel like they did something wrong. No woman should feel like a slut in an outfit that made them feel good, beautiful and proud. So to all of the women out there who have been called a sluts or whores, this is my advice to you. Walk away from the negative environment and love yourself. Follow your heart, make your own decisions with pride, be proud of who you are and never let anyone bring you down.
