Within the last decade, the East End has been a must for all tri-state area tourists. I've never witnessed anything like it. Instead of a five-minute commute to the store it'd take me 20. Every day Long Island activities were suddenly sacred events, and people would come out of the woodwork to hear people pronounce "coffee" and "water." Regardless of how many people visit the North Fork, East End culture has remained true. Here are some things North Forkers, like myself, hate to admit.
We avoid main roads like the plague.
Summer or fall? I'll be damned if you catch me on any main road. It's horrendous. People drive as if their eyes are closed and people who aren't from the area feel like they own the place (news flash, you don't). Whenever a tourist asks for directions, we pretend like back roads don't exist. That's one of the few things we keep to ourselves, because if they were discovered, I don't think any North Forker would be able to leave their house from July to October. We use the roads that aren't suggested on your GPS.
We're not telling you about all the secret restaurants and hangout spots.
Hard to find places are some of the best parts of the Island, and more specifically the North Fork. Small restaurants that are actually re-done old houses, and hidden beaches are the epiphany of the North Fork -- and, no, I don't know where Farm Country Kitchen is (yes I do).
We low-key love touristy activities.
Do we complain about apple pickers? Yes. Will you spot me at an orchard with a basket and riding boots on this fall? Yes. We complain but in the end, we do all the North Fork-y things everyone raves about, because we can. Wineries, horseback riding, beach trips and, yes, pumpkin picking -- we do it all. (But we'll get there before you because back roads are a thing).
We might say we're from the Hamptons if we're out of state.
It's really not worth trying to explain that if you're from New York, that doesn't always mean the City. So the easiest way to combat this small nervous breakdown is by saying you're from the Hamptons.
We don't eat seafood every day.
Although I'd love to. And unless you have money pouring out of every hole in your body, have a bagel like the rest of us, and save the lobster and scallops for the weekend.
