I have always pitied Sisyphus.

During my senior year of high school, I sat in english class talking about the “Myth of Sisyphus,” and how in Greek mythology, this king was destined to a punishment of pushing a rock up a hill time after time because of his selfish deeds and deceitful behavior. As we dissected the text, I could feel myself growing uncomfortable and agitated by how depressing his life seemed to be.

Yet, Albert Camus, the author of the acclaimed essay, thought his story was the epitome of the meaning of life -- how pointless the drudgery of life’s every day rituals proved to be. He claimed once humans came to terms with this undeniable blandness and disappointment of life, they would truly find happiness.

No, thank you. I would rather not walk through life devoid of emotion, unattached from society, from the very people who make it worthwhile, just to avoid getting hurt.

Life is full of sadness and regret, but I force myself to believe it is those dark times that catalyze change, showing us there is a reason to keep pushing that rock up the hill.

During my senior year in high school, a boy in my grade was shot and killed in an area of Chicago a mere fifteen minutes away from where I go to school, eat dinner with my family, and go to church. Those are all things he will never be able to do again.

Last week, I walked into a men’s homeless shelter a few blocks away from Marquette. I spent a couple hours talking to the men there - and learned about their interesting quirks and stories. One of them taught me how to play dominoes, and the game got competitive as I began to learn the rules.

Many of them had daughters, sons, girlfriends, and wives. Some suffered from drug or alcohol abuse or had issues with the law. Some were between jobs.

But, it seemed to me that all of these men were actively looking for a change - some piece of hope that would allow them to get back on their feet and continue to live.

I cannot help thinking about how those two events are connected - how they involve so much struggles and sadness - but also resilience and a drive to create a better life. Maybe this drive is for yourself, but it also may be for a kinder, more wholesome world.

I do not think I will discover the meaning of life by the time 2021 rolls around, and I have a diploma in my hand. But I do hope that I can find more meaning in my life’s work than Sisyphus was allowed.

I choose to believe our own happiness comes from touching others and showing them their potential. Camus believes “the struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart.” I choose to believe the view on the top of the mountain can be an even greater gift.