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To My Single Ladies Tired Of It All

*sings Beyoncé in the background*

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To My Single Ladies Tired Of It All
The Gospel Coalition

If you know me, you may be thinking that I am the last person to be offering advice on relationships. I beg to differ. Being single in college offers one a unique perspective. I see a lot of friends continue to be heartbroken and disappointed in their relationships. I think a large part of that is due to settling.

Settling for someone who doesn't treat you right, or someone who ignores you when you're sad. I'm so tired of seeing people hurt. I was never one of those girls who caught all the guy's attention or constantly had a boyfriend. It used to bother me a lot, but it doesn't anymore. I would much rather be with someone who is worth my time and love than be with someone so that I won't have to be alone. So I don't really understand why girls would even go out once with a guy who they KNOW isn't the kind of person they would be happy with.

I don't expect a perfect man. I'm not perfect. I do my best not to have a list of qualities. Would I like someone intelligent who loves Harry Potter and makes me laugh? Of course. Would it be even better if he liked musicals and to read and also liked to dip french fries in his milkshake? Absolutely. My future boyfriend/husband may have all of those qualities but truthfully I have no idea.

I have no idea the type of man that God has in store for me. I don't know when we'll meet, or if we already have. My grandmother has told me my whole life to make sure I get a man "who loves Jesus," and I intend to follow that advice. When I tell this to people, I get a lot of statements about how there aren't a lot of guys like that at college. My favorite argument is that "very few men are focused on the same things as you are at our age." To that, I respond: so exactly how much are you implying I should settle? And why do you have such little faith in our generation's men? Maybe if we held our men to higher standards, they would rise to meet them. I don't party, get drunk, or sleep around. Why would I hold a potential boyfriend to lower standards than I hold myself? And as my youth pastor's wife once said, "Mr. Right and Mrs. Okay don't go together." Okay, that might be the other way around, but the message is still the same.

Just because he makes you smile does not mean he is the one. Just because you are attracted to him does not mean he's the one. Please, please, wait for the guy who pursues you and treats you like you deserve. Wait for the man God has for you. No matter how long it takes, or how lonely you feel. Remember that being alone doesn't mean you're lonely, and there are people in your life that love you, single as a pringle or not.

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