It's the 21st century and technology has put the SOCIAL in social media. As great as this is, it has caused us to become dependent on each other. (Let's emphasize...way too dependent.) Opportunities for social interaction are at our fingertips, 24/7. And with this accessibility, comes pressure. The pressure of friendships, lifestyles, and our most favorite thing to talk about...relationships.
When in high school, the most exhilarating element was eavesdropping on the juicy drama of "Who's dating who?" or the butterflies we all felt when a friend said:
"Oh, I heard they have a crush on you."
Sound familiar? Don't pretend like you didn't enjoy it. We each develop that idealized version of true love - in every shape and form:
I mean…
February 14th when you secretly wished that you would receive a dozen roses and box of chocolates?
GiphyC'mon, even I'll admit I want that...
But the older I get, the more I have begun to pride myself not on how many people are romantically interested in me...but how much I am interested in myself.
Wait, what?
Oh, you heard me.
Today more than ever, we fall into the trap of depending on others for validation. We are connected as never before through our social networks. A like, a comment, 500 people sharing our picture, make us feel like we are something. Something great. Don't believe me? Ask yourself why you posted THAT picture on Instagram, or why you can name how many followers you have on Snapchat, but you can't think of the last time someone made you genuinely smile.
We have begun idolizing those relationships that exist to us as one hashtag or filtered picture at a time. We voyeuristically crave the life of two other lovebirds through our phone screen. We ask ourselves "Why can't I have a love like that?" And then, when a relationship presents itself, it comes crashing down.
Why?
Because growing up, somewhere we lost our ability to have a relationship with ourselves. We spend way too much time focusing on those around us to even realize that possibly the problem is ourselves.
Maybe we should start focusing on ourselves more before we throw ourselves at the next cute stranger walking down the street. Maybe the key to that picture perfect relationship is working on who we are as individuals before putting someone else first.
Because frankly, if you can't be by yourself, how do you expect to be with someone else?
This isn't encouragement to say no to the next person that gives you those butterflies, but it is a challenge to say yes to yourself. You never know;
You may just discover the missing piece from your puzzle.