The other day I happened to be watching an early episode of HIMYM. For those of you that have not watched this fantastic show let me give you a short synopsis. It's Halloween, Ted is on the roof waiting for the slutty pumpkin to show up, and Robin meets him up on the roof after being dumped. Robin states how it didn't really matter because she wasn't that into him which is the story of her life, how everyone around her is falling in love, and she questions why she doesn't want that more. She wants to want that, and thinks she is wired wrong or a cold person. Luckily she had a friend like Ted who said just the right thing. He told her she hadn't found the right Hansel yet.
I get a lot of strange looks when I say I'm single because I want to be. I get even stranger looks when I say I'm happy that way. I have had the Robin Scherbatsky mentality I saw everyone around me falling in love and acting stupid together. I have thought to myself why don't I want that more? I have also thought that maybe I am a cold person who just isn't built for relationships. Then I realized it's true I haven't found the right Hansel yet, but I enjoy the relationship I have with myself more.
I think figuring out who I am on my own has been the biggest favor I have done for myself. Especially with the way the dating game is today, it's enough to make you want to throat punch someone. I enjoy the idea that I can pick up and move anywhere I want without consulting another person. I like not having to share my bed or my food. I don't need someone's outfit approval. All of my nights are not themed and wide open as to how I want to spend them. Getting to focus on what makes me happy without a significant other has been valuable.
However, there are times where we might feel as if Hansel might never show up. Thinking hey maybe they got hit by a bus. In those moments we need friends like Ted to tell us don't worry they're on his way but until then you're great company and you've got us. Please don't tell them maybe they should try online dating apps because nothing ever comes of them. Please don't let them go home with some toolbag that isn't worth their time and will end up making them feel more alone than before. Please don't encourage them to casually date when you know they deserve more than some person who won't commit to them. Encourage them to figure out what is going to make them happy outside of a relationship. When the time is right that person will come along, but in the meantime enjoy the fact that you have no limitations in life right now.