Processing emotions after a pretty horrid falling out:
Way down the street
I feel the day we did meet
And I hope and I know
You'll find life in a fresh snow
And I know and I hope
You love and live and die all fine
And that you don't stay wake and cry
There's a day a coming tomorrow
Where there won't be no sorrow
For you and me and him
As you sing your saviors hymn
And I hope and I cry
That you just don't die
Without the love so strong
And the bond so long
As I talk to my sacred shrink
And wonder just what you think
I know you're happy with what you did
And that's enough to seal that lid
Oh do you care of the nights
We'd be so alone with no plans
And we'd crawl out with a crazed ideal
Love the only thing we did feel
With the shock from an ancient eel
Oh boy where are you gonna go
And what will you hear
As I travel on down that road
And know you're gone for good
I hope one day our paths do cross
But I got friends, no need for pain
All those times I screamed in vain
Maybe you'll hear my rhyme
And think of that sealed away time
We'll find a fork in the street
And both go left, back to where we did meet
But until then my brother I hope you're set
With no fear and no present fret
You killed me twice
And I loved you thrice
I hope you're happy and you thrive
As I strive for the day we once felt
A day you'd cast of that old mink pelt
And realize I had all to give
You had no need for that rusted shiv
I hope they give all they can
You find your fabled holy land
I'll be there for you one day
Maybe then you'll learn to stay
. . .
Reconnecting (I begin to awkwardly rebuild our relationship (after some pretty serious alcoholism):
You made me cry, ya made me die and I won't lie, I loved it all
Your hair was long, the sun was bright, each day with a long night,
Music, smoke and words danced, our parents worried, and god we lived,
The town was ours, we owned it all, speeding round the turns of life,
We were young, we were ready, and we were wrong,
summer nights one day end, new ways round life's bend, alone, without friend,
No nights laced with liquor, deep in the woods, my secrets buried,
I painted my face in false martyrdom, we all wore masks in fear, the end was near,
But forward we marched, to the saintly cabin, resembling wisdom of Walden,
My will to live survived, but something must've died, the part I tried to hide,
We parted sadly, it was quick, but by no means painless,
Gone with the wind, gone was my friend, crown of thrones upon my head,
I was no Jesus, a plastic false riding on the dashboard of your car, forward we marched,
But hey that's ok, I used to be liquor to kill the pain, now it's love,
And one day I'll get on up there, way over the hill, be right where I want to be,
There's a sun shinning, full of life, a shadow of a cabin hidden behind,
Life is right, as right as can be, after all we've seen,
Although our eyes have aged, just for me, see the sun before it fades,
It hasn't expired just yet.
. . .
We have rebuilt... but it is still strange and estranged among us all:
Two lovers set adrift in life,
Effortlessly moving forward,
Yet a weight stayed behind,
Tried to stay so blind,
There was a little spot,
Oh so grand,
In each of their hearts,
Still full and young,
Waiting to see nostalgic bliss,
Of a unique blend,
With robust emotion,
And a great deal of passion,
From sweet summer days,
Of sweat and steam,
Where all was warm,
All was home,
Bright days laced with hope,
Of New Years,
Carefree waltz's among the wood,
Enjoying all there was,
And all that could be,
But that was long ago,
When the sun shone bright,
Now it is a distant memory,
Of the days in the grass,
With no shoes or worry,
Far away, taken in winter's whisper,
Now a small love lingers,
Flowing forth at times of reunion,
But otherwise unknown,
A beautiful care,
An eternal empathy,
Of care and hope,
For themselves,
And for all,
How great to be a human,
On this fine morning,
Full of reunion.
. . .
I've developed long term memory issues over the past few years, so I tried to capture everything I wanted to remember from that time that mattered.
