Suicide awareness is something that we have all had exposure to. The topic has numerous walks and other awareness events across the world; it has its own ribbon, day, and month out of the year. Through this cause, we are exposed to the facts: that depression is projected to be the leading cause of death within the next 15 years. And that 34,000 people commit suicide each year. The enormity of this number is alarming, heartbreaking and worrisome. However, the truth is that this statistic is only a number until suicide personally impacts you. We know suicide is happening because we hear that it is frequently. The data laden approach of suicide awareness functions as an approach to educate, but does not do this highly personal issue justice. Presenting statistics allows for awareness that is void of the tragic narratives that society often deems taboo.

Despite our awareness of suicide’s presence in society, nothing can take away from the shock factor of when someone you know kills themselves unexpectedly, without showing any signs of suicidal thoughts or indications of depression. This, like many cases of suicide, is a result of silent suffering. Unlike suicide awareness, the idea of silent suffering is not something that gets a lot of coverage. Yet, it is the cause of thousands of suicide deaths a year. Turning our attention to ending silent suffering is a different approach to the subject that contributes directly to suicide prevention and the overall prevention and treatment of mental illnesses.

This is the inspiration behind the work of artist Marie Maciejko. Marie is pursuing her BFA in Painting at the University of Illinois, and ever since a very close friend of hers took his own life a few years ago, Marie has been passionate about suicide awareness. Through her work, she has become a strong advocate for suicide awareness, prevention, and more recently she has been focusing on spreading the word about silent suffering. In her most recent project, she decided on a project that encouraged people to share their personal stories. She would find people to interview that had been impacted by suicide, select a quote from the interview and paint their face with the quote at monumental size. Marie felt that taking advantage of the opportunity to spread awareness through her project was a good way to get her voice heard actively and powerfully. In order to find people to interview, Marie made the following post on Facebook:

“SUICIDE AWARENESS

As some of you may know I am a painting major at the University of Illinois. I need help with my next project. I have been interested in invoking the conversation of suicide awareness and I want to hear your story. It may be your story or a loved one’s, but I want to know what you would say or advise someone who may be going through a similar situation. Please either text me or Facebook message me for more information! Pass or share this to anyone who may be interested. Thank you.”

Marie’s post received immediate feedback: 16 people messaged her on Facebook and two reached out to her over text. She has yet to meet with many of the people, but the five people Marie has already interviewed seemed excited to be given the opportunity to not only share their story, but to help someone enduring something similar. Unfortunately, there are many people out there who are silently suffering from a mental illness or struggling with suicidal thoughts. These are the people Marie hopes to reach out to with her projects. “I am making them for all those people I know who have cut themselves, gone through depression, suffered from alcoholism, and those who committed suicide…what I have learned from life is that this needs to be a conversation because too many people suffer in silence.”

Among some of the quotes that Marie found most helpful for achieving her goal were:

“I do not understand how you feel because no one can, but you are not alone. I am here to listen to you.”

“I suffered in silence because I was afraid. I was afraid of what words would come out of my mouth and I was afraid that my family would never look at me the same.”

“At that moment in time, it feels like no on can save you. It’s like no person could say don’t do this and you wouldn’t do it.”

“It’s okay to let yourself not be okay, and it’s okay to not know what to do about it, but it’s not okay to ignore it.”

“People think that it is something that can be cured, even people who are suffering from it.”

“It’s not something you have any control over, which is another thing people don’t understand.”

Marie feels that the reason that silent suffering occurs so frequently and escalates so much—even to the point of suicide—is that people not only don’t want to talk about it, but they feel they can’t. When it comes to discussing someone’s suffering, there is almost always an air of discomfort—whether the person is talking to strangers, peers, friends, or family. People suffer silently because they are afraid of the discomfort and are unable to look beyond the stigma that discussing suffering, mental illness, or suicidal thoughts is something you don’t do. The inability to have these necessary conversations is what leads a person to feeling hopeless, and like they don’t have any options.

Marie recognizes the importance of addressing problems rather than ignoring them. She hopes that her project will serve as a voice for scared people and will encourage people not to suffer silently, but to seek help. On the other side, she uses advice from and about supporters in order to teach people the importance of listening—because these conversations need to be had. It is essential that people understand that mental illness is not a choice. It is not something that can be controlled. People who are suffering from mental illness need to know that they have options, and the best way to do this is for them to be heard.

If you want your voice to be heard in order to help those suffering in silence, Marie is still looking for people to interview and can be reached at m.maciejko30@gmail.com.