The most reccurring discussion I’ve had with my church leaders is how to be in a romantic relationship while keeping God at the center. The biggest reason I am attracted to Christianity is its message that we are to love everyone. The only knowledge I have of how to express God's love is through my family's love to me, personal experience, interpreting what I have learned from my church and reading the Bible.
I admit, I’ve tried several times, and I always seem to fail focusing on God in relationships. There are countless ways I've failed to keep a heart for God, and I am working on learning how to better express God’s love to those I care about.
First, I want to elaborate on what an appropriate expression of love is, because that’s something that can be misunderstood as a teenager. For many, high school is a very uncomfortable time because you are changing hormonally and beginning to understand sexuality. High school can be filled with “close” dancing at sweet sixteens, regrettable first kisses and someone unnecessarily touching your butt at a school dance. However, I have learned that when 1 Corinthians 6:19 says, "Your bodies are temples," it means our bodies are sacred. I cannot help but think that I should treat others with more respect, especially those of the opposite sex. Maturity comes with recognizing how to appropriately handle one's relationships.
Perhaps a friend of yours has a boyfriend, and you know that he is super insecure. By hugging your friend appropriately, you not only show that you care about her, but you show her and her boyfriend that you respect her and their relationship. Just come up and hug side to side, shoulder to shoulder with her. By hugging in this way, it shows that you appreciate the both of them in their relationship, while showing love to a dear friend. There are boundaries that people have, and if you respect those boundaries, you are showing love. Hugs are where it's at.
Another thing I have never been good at is being punctual on dates. When I say, “I’ll meet you at the mall at 7,” I manage to show up 20 minutes late, and immediately, I see my date’s arms crossed. I often think about showing up late to a date and compare it to when the Israelites in the forest were waiting for God: they were so anxious and must have had discouraging thoughts going through their heads -- that they weren’t appreciated or worthy, among other lies. They must have felt betrayed, like their faith wasn’t being met. They must have felt alone with no one to trust.
The greatest lessons I have learned have come from my experiences and listening to my church leaders, God and His Word. I have learned that God wants me to treat others the way they want to be treated. I want to show up on time to enjoy the date, and I want my date to feel like their faith is being met. That’s where I want to show God’s love -- in my timing.
Maturity is recognized when you show up at the appropriate time. I’m trying to be punctual and respectfully show love so that my friends, family and church see me in a better light. Jesus has shown me how to show love, and I want to keep growing in His light.
