First of all, I'd like to express how grateful I am to my mother and her advice, but also to have been raised in an era when the internet didn't control my self-image. The entire world is more readily available for us, more and more every day, and young girls are becoming desensitized to the effects of it – that changing our bodies, whether in big or small ways, is more important than school or self-love. Now that I am 20 years old looking in on younger girls around my age, I feel as though something needs to be said to some of you. Of course, I was once in your shoes and I wanted to impress certain people or look a certain way, but luckily, I never let that get bigger than myself – or allowed it to, at least. So for all young girls who may be pressured or vulnerable enough to want to change their bodies or personalities:
DO NOT act like you're already 25
I can't stress enough that acting older than how old you really are is really not cute. You may think you look mature, sexy or cute, but let me tell you: no one is taking you seriously. We all know you're not legal to drink so please just act your age. I know being independent and looking great is something you'd like to fast forward to, but it's not as glamorous as it looks. You have a ton of responsibilities, and more upsetting, you're getting older. So step back, chill out and don't think you have to drink to look cool or do anything else that jeopardizes your health. You're only a teenager, so let the adults handle all of that. Trust me, you'll regret that you didn't just act like your "inner child" during your teen years.
DO NOT bleach your hair
I repeat, DO NOT bleach your hair, no matter how good you want your hair to look, because you will more than likely regret it in a few years. Your hair will start to fall out, it'll look duller, it definitely won't grow as fast, and not to mention, your natural, beautiful hair will never be the same again. Believe me. I've seen far too many girls commit this crime and then regret it even immediately after. It's just not worth the chemicals and gross odor. Your hair, even though I may not be able to see it, is beautiful and healthy as it is now. If you really want to change your locks, use semi-permanent color without bleach or even try out some wigs.
DO NOT cake on the makeup
Aside from those who struggle with any acne conditions, there is really no need for makeup at your age. Your skin is flawless, healthy and wrinkle-free, so why on earth would you ruin that with makeup? And if you really feel the need to, just get some drug-store mascara and lipstick and you'll be good to go.
DO NOT chase over any guy
As cute or as beautiful as he is, if he's ignoring you, avoiding you or doesn't treat you in any way close to how you think he should treat you, please get over him. You will know when the right guy is the right guy just from simple actions. Besides that, why are you looking for love when you have a whole lifetime to do that? Go fall in love with something you want to do for the rest of your life, not one person.
DO NOT feel pressured into absolutely anything
I know saying it and doing it are two different things, but please listen to yourself. If you think it's wrong, then don't do it. And as my mother says to me, "Don't do anything that you'll be embarrassed about to tell me."
DO NOT choose friends (or anyone) over school
Your friends, if they're the right friends, will understand if you can't hang out because of schoolwork or studying. You know what you need to do in order to succeed, so don't worry that you'll miss a movie or a party. You'll still be the same person if you do, just a little smarter than everyone else!
Now finally, last but definitely not least. The only "do" that I have on this list and the tip that basically controls the ones above:
DO LOVE YOURSELF
I don't care what anyone else tells you, but the one thing that I hope you won't let anyone take away from you is your self-love. Self-love is so important not just for yourself, but for others because once you love yourself, it's going to resonate with so many other people. Frankly, the world needs love now more than ever. So if you take anything away from all of this, I hope it is this.
And remember: the only thing that is the end of the world, is the end of the world.
