In wake of the Stanford sexual assault case, I have something to say.
We are raising a society that values money, status and academic or athletic accomplishments over integrity, sincerity and the ability to be a good person. At the root of this case, and many others just like it, are the school systems, parents and pressures that failed us. Failed to teach us that consensual sex is just sex, and that anything but consensual is rape. Failed to teach us that it is more important to treat each other with respect and human decency, than it is to take a girl home at the end of the night, no matter what condition she may be in. Instead we are taught that alcohol is the culprit for all bad decisions. That his word takes precedence over hers. That she shouldn't have put herself in such a vulnerable position. Instead we blame the victim. Read that sentence again to yourself, "We blame the VICTIM." The person who is not guilty of committing a crime or violating someone's body. We blame that person and dissect every part of her being, her social, romantic and business life. We look to her flaws and her inability to handle her liquor. This is what is wrong with the criminal justice system, but more importantly this is what is wrong with humanity. He gets by with a slap on the wrist while she is left humiliated, stripped of her sanity, purity and sexual integrity. He fires back with lawyers, whose job it is to find loopholes in the case and to make us believe his word over hers.
The facts are cut and dry. He is guilty. He is in the wrong. He left her violated, alone and unconscious. We need to stop making excuses and start taking action. We need to not allow any more of these cases to become another statistic. To stop blaming the length of her skirt or amount of alcohol she consumed, and look to the perpetrator. We must look to what failed him, that led us as a society to inevitably fail her.
As the cast of HBO's "Girls" said in their recent PSA, "She is someone." She is someone's daughter, girlfriend, mother, sister, friend, boss, but most importantly, she is someone. Not that he is a star athlete, an Ivy League student, a man with unlimited potential, but that after he commits an act so barbaric his accomplishments, no matter how grand they may be, are nothing, they are no longer what is "important."
It is up to us, not just women and victims, to stand together, but for men to stand up alongside us. To unite as one human kind. To make sure that we are no longer breeding a society where sex is a material thing. Where women are to be had and sold.
I use the pronouns he and she because it is not just one case, it is hundreds, thousands, millions, worldwide. I commend the women, men and children that have the ability to tell their stories of sexual assault. And I commend the citizens who won't stand for it anymore. But I also commend the victims whose voices have been silenced, who would rather not have their stories plastered across every news station. It has gotten to the point where victims are forced to ask themselves, "Is it really worth it?" Is it worth the legal bills, invasion of privacy and year long trials?
The answer is yes. It is worth every single human being’s time to not only acknowledge these flaws in our criminal justice system, but to keep fighting, keep striving to eliminate the stigmas, to eradicate the statistics, to no longer make it an acceptable fact that, according to the CDC, 1 in 5 women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime. Your voice matters. Education is the most powerful tool we have to stop such heinous crimes. It is time that as a society we educate our youth, and start blaming the systems that have failed both the perpetrators and the victims. I strongly believe that there is more good than evil in this world, that there are more Swedes on bicycles, than morally corrupt college assholes. It is time we start proving it.
