God is our protector. He will cover you under His wings and He will give His angels charge over you. These are things I have heard over and over but they have never truly sunk in. Fear has always been a huge factor in my life. The fear of never being good enough, fear of my family's safety, fear of finances, etc. Fears so large they create anxiety in me and bring my stomach a constant uneasiness. The most recent one for me is when we moved into the house we are temporarily renting. Upon pulling into the neighborhood the thoughts and feelings of fright began to flood my mind. Before I even stepped foot in the door, I became worried. I would like to say it was because it was a neighborhood and not the country and thats why it made me uncomfortable, but before I got married I lived in neighborhoods my whole life. Actually, I was terrified to move to "the middle of nowhere," too. I have never done well with change but it's not change that scares me, it is not a neighborhhod nor the country; it's deeper than all of that. Long ago, although I can't pinpoint when I let Satan creep into my mind and never truly removed him. Sometimes hes more evident than others but that's because he always knows the perfect time to attack me. We moved in fouteen days ago and for fourteen days straight I have allowed him to rule my mind.
"Did you hear that noise?"
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"What is that person doing across the street?"
"Someone could attack you going to and from your car."
"Dont shower when you're home alone you wont hear them break in."
I could go on and on with these horrible thoughts. I was constantly looking out the windows for something suspicious. I would cry, reach out to people for prayer and listen to worship music (quietly, to hear a break in of course) to try and provide comfort. It all helped a little but I was still scared out of my mind. It wasn't until I was talking to myself this morning that I truly began a breakthrough. In my head I said, "I'm only scared when I'm alone, I'm never scared when Hunter is home." And then this sentence popped in my head, "Wow, so you're not scared when Hunter is with you but you are when I am with you? You are never alone, just as I appeared with Shadrack, Meshach and Abednego. I will be with you." It wasn't a quite voice but I know it was God.
It hit me hard. It made me quite ashamed of how little my faith had been lately but at the same time made me feel so loved knowing that even though I was in a sense doubting God, He still cared to reassure me that He was with me. It's like Natalie Grant says in her song King Of The World, "How could I make you so small when You're the one who holds it all? When did I forget that You've always been the king of the world?" How could I forget that He can do anything? He is omnipresent, omniscient, He is good!! When you have been saved as long as I have, your faith can become stagnant. The only way to revive it is by praying, quoting stricture and just simply remembering that God is bigger than it all! This goes for any kind of fear that weakens your faith from fear of safety to fear of the future! Emmanuel- God is with us! HE IS WITH YOU! Write that down somewhere where you can see it everyday! Below I will provide just a few of the scriptures that have helped me with my fear of safety! As always please let me know if you need anything from talking casually to us rallying together some prayer warriors! Not just about fear, about any issue and I won't make you pray or do anything you feel uncomfortable with!
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong me courageous. Do not afraid. Do not be discouraged. For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
"For He will give His angels change concerning you, to guard you in all your ways." Psalms 91:11
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:6-7
