On the outside, someone's life may look perfect. They may have the most vibrant personality, the most friends, the best grades, and other characteristics that we all desire. On the inside, however, that person may really be struggling to keep it all together. Everyday is a fight to maintain that perfect personality so that no one asks questions, or suspects anything less. Our society has conditioned us to act fine and be fine at all times, but we know that is not how life works.
Everyone has a story; an experience or collection of experiences that made them who they are today. Oftentimes, it is not the best stories that shape a person, but the worst of them; the darkest of secrets, pressed further and further down due to fear of rejection. Maybe a person has rejected us in the past, therefore we limit the amount of chances that we take with the next person. Maybe society has shown us the rejection that other people face with similar experiences, and so we decide that we will not subject ourselves to the same kind of treatment. This is unfortunately a well known norm in our society, with people who are on both ends of judgment and rejection. What we fail to realize is, although rejection hurts, suppressing our feelings can be even more painful.
As humans, we were made to connect with each other; to bond over similar life experiences, and to be there for each other during the best and worst of times. We all know that life is full of both wonderful moments and tragic times, and that even the person who we think has it all together, may be internally falling apart. With that common knowledge, why do we continuously respond to the daily question of "How are you?" with "Good.", "Fine.", or "I'm doing alright.", especially on days when we know that we aren't? And why do we accept those robotic answers from everyone that we pass without any further inquiry?
Society has taught us to only accept the positives from people. That if we don't acknowledge the not-so-perfect side of a person, that it does not exist. We have forgotten how to listen to understand, and now we only listen to respond. We have even been programmed to write off a person's issues, even if we may be going through something similar ourselves. False positivity is not good for the soul, it is only disguising an issue as less important than it actually is.
Sharing a story or a long held secret about our lives with someone can actually have some amazing benefits. You never know who's life you have touched by being brave enough to admit, acknowledge, and embrace your imperfections. Doing this helps others to know that they are not alone, and it shows them that you are someone that they can go to for advice in the future. Sharing your story makes you a more authentic person; someone that others can look up to and feel inspired by. You will also benefit greatly from speaking out. Those who listen will be willing to help you through the hard times, and reassure you that although things may be rough right now, they will always get better.
Very few times in life will people reject you for a slight imperfection. We all have them, therefore we have no right to judge others for what they are going through. As humans, we have more in common with each other than we think, but the only way to know that is through sharing details of our lives with others. More often than not, your story will help someone, and they in return can help you with with the things that you are going through. Life is beautiful, but being able to acknowledge and share the messy things in our lives can only make us stronger. The next time an opportunity arises to talk about a tough situation, take it. Your actions will more than likely be rewarded.
"When we share our stories, what it does is open up our hearts for other people to share their stories. And it gives us the sense that we are not alone in this journey." -Janine Shepherd