For so long, I’ve looked at the characteristics that some shmuck assigned to my generation and have been ashamed because they consist of words like “entitled,” “selfish,” and “narcissistic.” The connotation of being a millennial is embarrassing, especially when I know that I don’t fit that criteria. Then the more I thought about it, while there are definitely those who are, most of my friends and family who fall within the same generation as me are not at all what the Baby Boomers and Gen Xers think of us. WE did not invent the super advanced technology that makes our lives so much easier that we were raised in the era of convenience and therefore are not used to having to wait for much. In fact, while we do love it, we still get sick of it and long for simplicity every now and then. We are simply a product of what you gave us, and regardless of the fact that we may find it harder to communicate with people face-to-face and on a personal level, we still long for it. We still WANT connection, and let’s be honest, you made the world rely so heavily on technology, not us. Ok, maybe selfies and social media were our invention, but you do see the good it's done, right? Connecting long lost friends, raising money for fantastic causes, bringing people together.

And selfish? Are you kidding? Have you seen how hard young people have been fighting for all kinds of equality, and not for their own sake, but for others’? No, because you’re too busy focusing on the fact that we want “free stuff” like a college education that you say is vital to both our and our country’s futures, but that we can barely afford. It’s fitting that our other name is Generation Y or, as I think it should become known as, Generation WHY. We’re constantly questioning the “way it’s always been” because let me tell you, as someone who’s been working at a nonprofit managing volunteers stuck in their ways, answering the question “Well, why can’t we change things up?” with “because that’s the way it’s always been” IS THE WORST ANSWER EVER.

Gen Xers have lived through immense social change, but Generation WHY sees that we still have so much further to go. You would think that with such a tolerance-minded previous generation, we would be supported in our efforts to get there, but instead, we get put down. WHY?

If you research what all the surveys say about us, you’ll find more that say we’re optimistic, civic-minded, engaged, yet it’s the entitlement that defines us? Seriously, Wikipedia that sh*t. You tell me my fellow millennials’ expectations for the world are “too great” and that we need to be more realistic, but then when you lead my professional training sessions, especially in sales and marketing, you practically shove the phrase “Attitude Affects Aptitude!” down my throat. WHY?

There are selfish and entitled people in every generation, yet we millennials are the ones raised in the age of technology so we’re the only ones that can be characterized by immediate gratification? WHY?

You tell me I need a college education to get anywhere in life so I sell my soul to the devil to pay for it and then when there’s no job available for me out of college and I have to dig my debt-hole deeper, you say that my desire for other young people to have AFFORDABLE access to college is selfish? WHY?

This country and this world are in crisis right now, but the news is more concerned about the Kardashians and Beyonce dropping Lemonade (now all I’m picturing is B legitimately dropping a glass of lemonade on the ground, but I digress). And even though it’s mostly Gen Xers running the news, the fact that we follow suit, despite those of us who complain about it, means that we’re the selfish ones who only seem focused on pop culture? WHY?

Why?

Maybe I’ve misled myself. Maybe I need to read the research in closer detail. Maybe I don’t know everything there is to know about why millennials are selfish and maybe it’s just that we’re viewing things from different perspectives. So by all means, correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t you doing an incredible disservice to those who will soon LEAD this country, but putting us down as entitled and selfish when you should be trying to hear us out?

Why is our desire for change selfish, almost shameful, but yours wasn’t?

It’s time that the generations stop fighting and start listening. It’s time we heard each other out. I’ll listen to you if you listen to me. But most of all, we all need to start recognizing that there have been bad eggs in every generation, people who spoil it for the rest of us, and we need to stop focusing on the negative aspects and start paying attention to the positive ones. Millennials are far more willing to work hard for larger scale social scale to benefit the world, not just the country and not just ourselves, than we’re given credit for.