Why is it that when we hear these two words together, it sounds wrong when, in fact, they work together so well?

Let me stand on my soapbox for a minute.

This is something I've talked to with friends and family about numerous times. I have disagreed with how the church often negatively portrays the sin of "sex before marriage" with the mindset of it being "the most horrible sin you will ever commit". Yes, having sex before marriage is considered a sin in the Bible. I have friends that say they are Christians and don't think they will wait until marriage. I know friends my age and younger who didn't wait. They've lived in guilt and shame and I don't think they should. Yes, what they did was a sin. But if they lied about something or stole something from Walmart, they won't feel as guilty as having sex before marriage. The church has taken this sin and emphasized it greatly and, yes, the consequences are harsher than lying or stealing, but I believe that in God's eyes, all sins are the same. The world and society we live in would agree otherwise. I have chosen to wait until marriage before I have sex. That doesn't mean I'm pure. I've fallen into temptation before and I regret the choices I've made, but they've changed and formed my character and I'm still a child of God and God still loves me and I'm not going to hell because of what I did. I've prayed for God to forgive me and I have forgiven myself. It takes time, but it's possible. Children who grow up in the church and have these negative or harsh views shoved down their throat will be scared to have sex or if they fall into temptation, will feel much worse than someone else who didn't grow up with a religious background and didn't experience the same experiences that someone else did. I am scared to have sex. I truly am. I know it's a beautiful thing and it's AMAZING when you and your partner have gotten into a groove of knowing what you both like (WHICH IS WHY COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR PARTNER MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER) but until that day comes, I will be petrified. I believe this is because of how the church has told me about sex. "Sex is bad. Sex is wrong. Sex is dirty." No, it's not. The church has said these things to scare young adults into being "pure" until marriage. No one prepares you for that moment when you say "I Do" and all rules are gone. It's not an easy transition and I think the church should be doing a better job of transitioning couples into this stage of life where they go from "staying pure" to being a husband and wife and "fulfilling covenantal beliefs".

I will get off my soapbox now.