After a week of midterms and eight hours of buses, trains, and planes to get home, my first weekend of spring break has consisted of little more than hibernating in my bed wrapping up the loose ends of my homework and flipping through TV channels. Maybe it's the fact I have ten entire days away from dining hall food, but I keep winding up watching the Food Network. Every time a new show starts, I go through the same feelings.

1. Hm.. That looks good.

I usually don't intentionally turn on Food Network, but the moment I see a batch of perfect cupcakes filled with stuff I can't pronounce, I'm hooked for the next hour. I'm not a terrible cook by any means, but not once have I pulled something out of the oven looking a tenth as mouth-watering as it does on television.

2. I can do that!

Somehow I always get sucked into the "it can't be that hard" trap. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong, but my somehow every time I try to make one of those fancy fruit and vegetable salads it tastes more like a bowl of compost than a gourmet meal.

3. Alright, no more frozen food.

"Look at all these great things I can make so easily on a budget! I'm never eating two dollar frozen pizza again!" The infamous declaration made every time you see Emeril or Rachael Ray make an entire week of recipes in one night for ten dollars. It lasts until you get to the grocery store, realize you can't find half the ingredients in the recipe, leave the cart in the middle of the aisle and go through a McDonald's drive-thru.

4. Okay, I'm really going to try.

By chance I am able to find every ingredient on the list and clean the kitchen enough to have space to make it, I start off very committed. Once I even tried to put all the ingredients in those little bowls after they were measured but before they went into the batter, then I realized I would have to wash all of the bowls and threw the towel in on that idea. With or without the little bowls, by the time I finally finish the batter and pour it into whatever dish (or the closest thing I can find), I'm generally just hoping it turns out edible.

5. Second time's the charm?

If it turns out overcooked/undercooked/the wrong color, odds are there are enough ingredients to try again. Since I already made the trip to the store and put that much effort in, I generally figure I should give it another try.

6. Good enough.

By the second time around it's usually edible, albeit not pretty, but at that point I figure it's the best it's going to get and go wash the dishes.

7. I'm just going to watch.

When making some fancy custard dish somehow turns into a four and a half hour activity and doesn't even turn out looking like it does on the show, I come to the conclusion that food shows are for entertainment while eating take out. Until I come home for my next break and suddenly decide I can make that, and the cycle begins again.