This summer I began working as a server at a restaurant, and it has been quite an eye-opening experience. I already had experience working in the food industry from a fast-food job I had last year, but serving is a whole different ball game. One of the major things that I have learned is that the guests who sit at your tables can either make your shift great or completely miserable. So I have compiled a list of things you can do to ease some stress and tension for your server, and ultimately give you a better dining experience.
1. Non-verbals
Your server deals with a lot of people during a shift, and a simple smile and eye contact go a long way. Like, seriously. Staring at your menu or at your phone while your server is greeting you can be discouraging and make your server feel like they're bothering you for doing their job. Just take a couple moments to look up at who is going to be taking care of you for the next hour or so and give them some common-courtesy. It helps more than you know.
2. Call them by name
In almost every restaurant I have ever been to, the server always approaches the table and begins with introducing themselves.
"Hey! My name's (insert name here) and I'm gonna be taking care of you today!"
This is done to create a bit of familiarity and add more comfort to the experience for the guests. But a great way to make your server's day is to call them by their name throughout your time in the restaurant. You may think it's awkward to call someone by name who you really don't know, but it's not uncomfortable at all. It shows your server that you took the time to pay attention when they were introducing themselves, and then cared enough to remember their name. Trust me, it just helps. Plus, it's easier to catch your server's attention by using their name, rather than calling out "sir!" or "ma'am!" when you need that to-go box.
3. Patience and Grace
One of the most dreaded scenarios for a server is finding out that something went wrong in the kitchen. Realizing that we've run out of something, rang in the wrong food or gotten orders confused is one of the worst feelings ever. Nothing is worse than going out to a table and having to tell them that they can't have exactly what they wanted, because it's our job to make our guests happy. You have no idea how many times I hear the words, "Please tell me we're not out of that!" from a panicked server.
It sucks.
But there is good news, because exercising patience and grace to your server relieves so much anxiety.
A few things to keep in mind when this happens: 1. Your server usually has no control over what happens in food preparation, 2. you server will immediately take action and do whatever it takes to fix the situation, so being mad will not speed up the process, and 3. everyone makes mistakes sometimes. (Pro-tip: Your server is human.)
4. Talk to them
This one depends on the situation. If the restaurant is packed full of people, and your server has eight tables to take care of, then maybe engaging in a conversation with them isn't the best idea. However, if the situation allows, talk to your server. They like to hear about where you're traveling to or from, or just small talk that seems appropriate. It creates that familiarity and erases some distance. Meeting new people is fun, and you already know their name, so why not?
5. Let them know
So now your meal has come to a close, and your belly is full. If your server has done a good job and you're pleased with your experience, let them know. It's so rewarding when my guests tell me that I've done a good job. It boosts your server's confidence and makes their day brighter. Everyone likes to be acknowledged and appreciated.
6. PLEASE, for the love of God...
Do not, under any circumstances, rip up your straw wrapper into a thousand tiny pieces. It's a pain and the absolute worst. If you do this, stop doing it. Please. I'm begging you. We're all begging you.
When you walk into a restaurant, I know that your mind is going to be set on the food that you are going to receive. I mean, that's where my mind is at when I go out to eat. But keep in mind that there are people who work very hard to make sure that you are happy and well taken care of, and you should treat them like you'd treat anyone else (assuming that you treat others with respect and understanding). Now you've had an amazing dining experience and your server can't wait for you to come back again.
