Have you ever realized how much easier it is to talk negatively about yourself rather than talk yourself up? With the pressures of society revolving around how you should look, who you should be friends with, and how you should act—it is very difficult to miss the trap of belittling yourself and simply not feeling good enough. It is especially difficult at this time, when you are trying to develop as a person, maybe in regards to your education or career. How do we love ourselves when we are not quite sure who we are, and better yet, who we want to become?
I find it incredibly important to always make an attempt to change your perspective when you are not happy. A positive mind leads to a positive life, and you are the only you that is and that will ever be. How can we practice self love?
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Document it!
A conversation started with a friend of mine the other day after she posted a selfie on Instagram with the caption, "I believe in capturing the moments when I'm happy to remind myself when I'm down!" (See the beautiful picture above). We may be hesitant to share moments when we feel good about ourselves, fearing the remarks about narcissism from others, but I am a huge proponent of saying: Who the hell cares?
If you can find something you like about yourself physically—document it! Makeup on point? Make it your Snapchat story or share a photo on Instagram. Hitting the gym and making gains? Do not be afraid to share that Transformation Tuesday. These things do not even have to be public if you do not want them to. Write down that product that made your hair look stellar, or make an album on your phone of your favorite outfits so you can go back to them when you want to feel good. Reminding yourself what boosts your confidence, and the times when you felt good, are very helpful for a positive view of you!
Detox!
I am not talking about a juice cleanse or some green tea that claims to burn tons of fat in 14 days. What I am talking about, however, is removing the toxic from your life in terms of negative energy. There is nothing worse than being surrounded by people who make you feel worthless. Quite frankly, they are not worth your time.
Unfortunately, the closest people to us can sometimes be the most toxic. Reevaluate the relationships you are in. One thing I have learned recently is that we teach others how to treat us. Loving yourself means knowing the respect you deserve, and if people do not support you...it can lead to doubts. Do not allow exterior factors determine how you feel inside. I am not saying it is easy by any means, but if you cannot value yourself as the number one priority it will be difficult to be valued as a priority by anyone else. I believe it is healthier to be happy and alone, than miserable and surrounded by others.
The Law of Attraction
With all that being said, it is essential to your happiness to make an attempt to change your perspective. It goes back to the idea of "The Law of Attraction," if you focus energy on the bad, you will manifest negativity. Therefore, the opposite holds true. To manifest positivity, you must focus on the good--simple logic. So, not only document the physical attributes that you enjoy, but remind yourself of what you have accomplished. Save the test you received a high grade on, photograph when you are having the time of your life, and keep track of your good deeds. I find it very comforting to write down what you are grateful for, and it will help you see how good you have it.
Things you do not like? Change what is in your control, and spin that perspective into positive thinking. Instead of constant thoughts like, "I gained some weight and I am not happy about it," remind yourself, "I started working out and I feel great!"
The most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. Cherish it, and keep in mind that all relationships take work. You will have your good days, and you will have your bad days, but patience is truly a virtue. Enjoy your life, because all the others are taken. *wink*
