If you can’t love yourself, how the hell can you love someone else?

I see people all the time who are dying to get into a relationship, no matter who it is or when it is. Well, guess what, that will not work.

How can you love someone when you do not like what you see in the mirror? How can you like seeing two of you in the mirror? Self-care is so important. I am not talking about a bubble bath, face mask and a glass of wine. I am talking about knowing your worth and exactly what you deserve.

Getting into a relationship when you do not know what you need and deserve is a recipe for disaster. This is when people walk all over you. This is when you get your heart broken the most and the most damage is done. This is when the worst is brought out in you. I would know.

When you do not know how you even want to be treated or who you want, then how will anything ever work out. You have to know what you are looking for to find someone who is a match for you. You have to know your worth, even if it means letting go of someone you thought would be yours forever.

This was me for years. I did not care about waiting for the right guy, I was just tired of being lonely. I was willing to give my heart to anyone who would take it. So, people took it and broke it. Actually, more like beat it up, shattered it, or torn it to pieces. Not realizing my self worth made me more vulnerable, weak and desperate and it was very obvious. It wasn’t until I put myself first that I started connecting with people like I had never done before. Putting myself first took time, took dedication and to be honest, started to happen after pure devastation…of course, a terrible relationship.

When you love yourself, you become a different person. Someone who isn’t self-conscious and always worrying about what other people think of them. Someone who can have more fun, and who can fall for a person more naturally. When you love yourself, the worries go away, you can laugh without fear that your laugh is too ugly or dance without fear that you might sweat and ruin your makeup. You can finally see that no matter if this next person doesn’t love you for “you’ then you don’t need him/her. PERIOD! You actually can stand on your two feet and look at yourself and like what you see.

I’m not saying that one day everything will be perfect and you’ll be the most desirable single, confident and independent person there is. But learn to love yourself, I mean truly know what you need and what you hate. Even if you need to make a list, that is cool too.