As someone who reads often, I am constantly being recommended books. I genuinely love this (regardless of whether or not I read their recommendation) because it makes me feel less lonely in being a bookworm, allows me time to geek out over books and restores my faith in the incredible institution that is the library. JK, everyone I know uses e-readers.
Enjoying others sharing their favorite picks aside, there is onetype of recommendation that never really jives with me: the self-help book.
I'm all about talking books, but nothing kills a book conversation for me more than someone interjecting with "But have you read 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People?'" No Chad, I actually haven't. I'm currently finding my levels of effectivity on point, but thanks for being the 7,000th person to recommend that one. What other Oprah book club picks do you have for us today?
Now obviously, that is probably a very good and helpful book or I wouldn't have been recommended it so many times. And to be clear, I have nothing against anyone who lives by self-help books, check out earlier where I acknowledge my appreciation for the fact that you're actually reading something.
It's just that I don't know how to tell someone that the book that changed their life may not have the same impact on me. I guess for me, there is just something difficult to digest about someone I've never met giving me advice on how to be a better version of myself.
For example, I wouldn't walk into a car dealership and tell a salesman how to sell cars because I'm an experienced and successful salesperson at another dealership. So why would I seek something similar from a self-help book? How can someone who doesn't even know my name tell me how to be a better me?
Don't get me wrong, I think self-introspection is really important. Identifying what you need to change or how you can live a happier, fuller life are important things to address, but they can be accessed in many ways.
I find in reading works of fiction, I can more intimately experience what a character is going through in a way that can fundamentally alter my perspective. When reading a self-help book, I feel like I am simply consuming a bulleted list of carefully curated advice, versus living through what feels like a plethora of experiences, lifetimes and lessons in works of fiction.
So sure, I think the concept of self-help is important, no matter how you find it. Taking care of your brain and having objectives is awesome, but I use books to escape, not to focus on what my brain already thinks about all of the other hours of the day.
Basically what I'm getting at here is this: Please stop recommending self-help books to me, I really really really don't care.