Seinfeld Describes College | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

Seinfeld Describes College

"Serenity now, insanity later."

42
Seinfeld Describes College
fanart.tv

As we move through our undergraduate career, we realize that most of our time (besides attending class) is spent on figuring life out. As I searched for ways to explain the lessons I've learned thus far in my undergraduate career, I looked no further than the '90s sitcom I was born and raised on: "Seinfeld." These four thirty-somethings go through everything together; there's honestly an episode for any situation you can imagine. Hence, obviously I found tons of advice and reflections of my own life thus far through these nine seasons of glory.

1. One of the first steps to becoming a true adult is moving out of the dorms and into an apartment.

2. Moving in is a struggle

So many boxes and bags. How did I ever have this many things? How is any of this going to fit in my tiny room with a full bed? Oh my God.

3. As a poor college kid with low standards of living, you quickly realize there will always be something you need to email your landlord about.

The lock is broken, the sink is leaking and the heat decides to stop working on the coldest day of the semester. "Well, this has all been one big tease!"

4. Apartment life can certainly stink. . . much like that garbage in the kitchen.

Maybe it was that onion from that stir fry or is it the ancient coffee grounds? Is it both? Either way you've got to get that trash out now!

5. Rent always seems to be due, no matter how poor you feel that week.

Over it. Utilities, rent, random expenses and bills. They never stop coming!

But you have to keep slapping that money down because you don't want to be that guy.

6. Sometimes event the simplest of tasks are a journey.

"Do you have any idea how much time I waste in this apartment?"

7. Sometimes cleaning is one of the grossest things you've ever had to do.

I'm forever making this face when I pull hair out of the shower drain.

Sometimes all you can do is bleach, cry, and try to forget about the horrors you've seen.

8. I'm constantly saving coupons because I'm thrifty. . . but in actuality forget about them until they've expired.

9. I'm always on the look out for the UPS man.

Be it for clothing, textbooks or gifts. I feel as though I am always looking for a polo clad man carrying a package up my steps before he knocks abruptly on the door and bolts down the stairs.

10. Scheduling appointments is never fun either.

Honestly any situation in which I have to speak with real humans on the phone in a matter that doesn't involve food is never fun.

11. Often times I find myself slaving away for an hour in the kitchen only to produce a mediocre meal.

I can't let this food go to waste. At least it's edible, so I guess this'll do.

12. When in doubt, order take out.

13. And if you do that too much, take a zumba class.

They may be an hour of Enrique Iglesias and Pitbull hits from three years ago, but these classes are the best way to get an hour's worth of cardio and have fun doing it.

14. Sometimes you might wake up late for class.

15. You won't always love the professor of your classes either.

16. Cramming for tests are never what you want to be doing on a Thursday night.

17. But sometimes it's all worth it.

You'll answer that question correctly in class that stumped everyone else.

Or maybe you aced that test you crammed all night for.

18. Sure, week days may be rough. But the weekend exists for a reason.

Time to bro down...

and drink up.

19. That age old rhyme? There's some merit to it.

Liquor before beer. . .

You will most certainly be in the clear.

20. You will never avoid creepy boys at parties.

Try as you might, they will always find a way to crawl out of the woodwork.

21. So, it's best to develop a strategy to get out of these unwanted situations.

The buddy system is a major key to success. Find a friend to pull you out of a conversation!

22. Worst comes to worst, I have always found success in dancing really weird as the easiest way to ward off potential creeps.

23. Street Meat (or junk food of any sort) is the best way to conclude a night out.

And also the best way to eat your feelings.

24. If you had a great night, you'll know by how difficult it is to get into bed.

Or by the "hot" pictures you discover the next morning. Did you honestly think a filter could fix that mess?

25. The next morning you will feel awful.

You are Jerry, the old man is your hangover.

26. Always be on the alert on your way to class.

You could be strolling to Economics, minding your own business...

Then conveniently run into that one person you never wanted to see again!

27. As the seasons pass and the years roll by you get tired of going out.

28. You become a true cynic about everyone and everything.

29. But you've also landed a real internship at this point.

30. Yet, you still don't feel ready for the real world.

31. At the end of it all, you've become sort of an adult and now have a shiny degree to prove you've done something for these past four years.

32. Here's to you, certified adult.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
college shirt

These individuals excel in their studies, fueled by both natural intelligence and hard work. From the ambitious Entrepreneur to the talented Theatre Person, each student on this list embodies a unique aspect of college life and showcases the diverse interests and passions found on campus.

Keep Reading...Show less
Christmas Tree
History.com

Now that Halloween is over, it's time to focus on the Holiday Season. Don't get me wrong, I think Thanksgiving is great and can't wait for it, but nothing gives me greater joy than watching Freeform's 25 Days of Christmas, lighting peppermint scented candles, decking the halls, and baking gingerbread cookies. So while we approach the greatest time of the year, let's watch the 15 best Christmas movies of all time.

Keep Reading...Show less
6 Signs You Are An English Major

There are various stereotypes about college students, most of which revolve around the concept of your major. Unfortunately, we often let stereotypes precede our own judgments, and we take what information is immediately available to us rather than forming our own opinions after considerable reflection. If I got a dollar for every time my friends have made a joke about my major I could pay my tuition. One stereotype on campus is the sensitive, overly critical and rigid English major. Here are six telltale signs you are one of them.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

27 Things 'The Office' Has Taught Us

"The Office" is a mockumentary based on everyday office life featuring love triangles, silly pranks and everything in between. It can get pretty crazy for just an average day at the office.

3141
the office
http://www.ssninsider.com/

When you were little, your parents probably told you television makes your brain rot so you wouldn't watch it for twelve straight hours. However, I feel we can learn some pretty valuable stuff from television shows. "The Office," while a comedy, has some pretty teachable moments thrown in there. You may not know how to react in a situation where a co-worker does something crazy (like put your office supplies in jello) but thanks to "The Office," now you'll have an idea how to behave ifsomething like that should happen.

Here are just a few of the things that religious Office watchers can expect to learn.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

10 Signs You’re A Pre-Med Student

Ah, pre-med: home of the dead at heart.

1871
Grey's Anatomy
TV Guide

Being pre-med is quite a journey. It’s not easy juggling school work, extracurricular activities, volunteering, shadowing, research, and MCAT prep all at the same time. Ever heard of “pain is temporary, but GPA is forever?” Pre-meds don’t just embody that motto; we live and breathe it. Here are 10 symptoms you’re down with the pre-med student syndrome.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments