Freshman year can be hard. Things are changing and you're in an unfamiliar time and place in your life. You don't want to admit that sometimes help is what you need in order to get you off of your feet and back on the road to success. However, sometimes seeking help is the simplest thing you can do for yourself to pull out of the abyss you're in. Here are 55 things that I wish I had done, in addition to seeking medical help, when I fell into a state of major depression last spring.
1. Left my room
2. Talked to my mom
3. And my dad
4. And my roommates
5. Taken care of my body and mind
6. Told my counselor the truth right away
7. Stopped trying to mask my anxieties
8. Took self-care more seriously
9. Understood that I am not the first nor the last person to struggle with this mix of depression and anxiety
10. Understood that my parents were the least judge-mental people I could talk to
11. Understood that above all things, I come first
12. Understood that professors understand more than I realize
13. Engaged in more things that "filled my gas tank of life"
14. Realized that toxic people DON'T help deteriorating mental health
15. Neither does binge-eating pizza
16. There is no reason to feel shameful for how I feel
17. Reached out for help beyond my University's counseling center
18. Realized that feelings of sadness are normal to a certain extent
19. Talked nicely to myself.
20. Gave myself the recognition and praise I deserved, rather than tearing myself to shreds
21. Understood that nobody is perfect
22. Not even me
23. Realized that sometimes, the people who are most willing to help you, aren't the ones who you live with or talk to everyday
24. Realized that although some people see me as a head-case, I'm not in fact, a "head-case"
25. Found more healthy ways to cope with feelings
26. Paid more attention to my body and what it was telling me
27. Paid more attention to how I was feeling, rather than pushing my feelings under the rug for months
28. Slept less
29. Smiled more
30. Journaled every single day
31. Called my mom more often
32. Felt the desire and worth to call someone and tell them what I was going through
33. Not listened to the lies that floated through my mind everyday
34. Been more mindful and accepting of my own feelings
35. Ate less Chick-Fil-A
36. And more salads
37. Prayed
38. NOT listen to sad music on repeat all day, every day
39. Realized that people understand
40. And are willing to help you
41. Realized that it's okay to ask for help
42. And asking for help doesn't mean you're weak
43. It actually shows great inner strength
44. Been more accepting of others demons
45. Been more accepting of my own demons
46. Read more poetry
47. Painted along to Bob Ross more often
48. Sang in the shower, despite crying and flushing the day away down the drain
49. Spoke up
50. Not isolated myself away from those who wanted to help me
51. Been honest with everybody
52. Didn't try to hold it together all of the time
53. Wasn't afraid to show true emotion
54. Knew and understood that it is okay to not be okay
55. Called my hecking mom
Suicide rates have tripled among college-aged students since the 1950's. Each year the number of young adults who commit suicide rises. I didn't want to be a statistic, I wanted to be more. When you feel yourself sliding down a slippery slope of anxiety and depression, it is important to keep in mind that you are not alone. And the sooner you seek counselling or help in any other form, the better you'll feel. I promise.
National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255