This is a topic I've been wanting to talk about for a long time, because I hear the worries from family, friends, and others around me on a daily basis. In our society and culture today, there are a lot of opinions and standards set regarding singleness, dating, and relationships.
I am a 19 (almost 20) year-old college girl, and the truth is that I've been single my whole life. I never had a boyfriend. A lot of people are astounded when I tell them this, and I've even received some judgment for it. A lot of my friends have been in relationships or are in a relationship currently, so I'm used to watching from the sidelines. I'm that friend that people come to for relationship advice even though I've never experienced one, but I'm always open to be a listening ear.
It took me a long time to realize the significance and value of seasons of singleness. I am a completely different person now then I was in high school, and that is a very good thing. Now, I realize that it was probably best that I wasn't in a relationship back then. I've changed for the better and that is because I had the time to work on myself, my character, and my relationship with God. Along with growing in confidence and managing anxiety, I've also learned to be content in my independence. I've always had an old soul, but my season of singleness has equipped me to be wiser and more introspective and mature. I have strong personal goals and priorities.
There are times when I become sad or feel lonely watching others in relationships, but I have to remind myself that I've been specifically stationed and that I'm at where I'm at for a reason. I personally believe that God has a plan for everyone, and not all of those plans will look alike or be the same. Everyone is on their own journey in life, growing in different areas and directions at different times.
Learning to be content in your season is challenging, especially in today's fast-paced society and a world that is constantly telling you that you need more and need to be more. People often rush to be in fun, short-lived relationships, compare themselves to others, and strive for attention on social media. It's important to remember that contentment comes with showing gratitude for the here and now and trusting that your needs will satisfied.
If you are in a season of singleness, my advice is to take part in some deep self-reflection. What are some areas of your character that you can better and work on? What are some of your passions and personal goals, and how do you plan on reaching them? How can you use your gifts and current resources to follow your present calling? After answering these questions and acting upon them, you will gradually build confidence and gain a greater appreciation for yourself and your season.
-M
