So often our generation competes on social media for the "perfect relationship." Not only in dating relationships but also in friendships. People post pictures of them and their significant other, or with them and their best friend. Of course, it has to have perfect lighting, look casual, and have a catchy caption or else you just won't get any likes. Everyone has to look at you and your best friend/boyfriend/girlfriend and think #goals. Everyone has to approve of your post or else you don't feel the same sense of confidence in your relationship. I have heard so many couples, grown and young, have arguments over a social media post. Men who get their girlfriend/wife flowers and the girl doesn't share a picture on Facebook, women who aren't their boyfriend/husband's "Woman Crush Wednesday." Think about people who haven't posted a picture with their significant other in a while, you start to assume they broke up. People are so petty about social media posts, and I know I am guilty of the same judgments too at times.
Instead of basing ideal relationships on how cute Instagram and Facebook posts are, we should base them on the Bible and what it says. So here are some of my favorite verses pertaining to relationships.
1. Proverbs 13:20
"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise,
but the companion of fools will suffer harm."
Surrounding yourself with uplifting and positive influences will only increase your growth and strength in a relationship. Being around people who are wise and seek out the council of God and the Bible are the one's who will have a long-lasting impact on your life. Getting involved with wise people helps you to grow in your faith, which ultimately helps you grow in your relationship with Christ. A friend or significant other that leads you to Christ is someone to value and cherish.
2. Proverbs 31:10-11
"10 An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain."
In healthy relationships there is a high level of respect and honor given to the opposite party. The husband is honored through the actions of his excellent wife. As a result of her honoring him, the wife is honored and respected higher than jewels and the husband trusts in her. The high levels of respect are working together to form a unity and strong foundation for the relationship to be rooted in.
3. Proverbs 27:17
"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."
The best relationships are those in which both people have a commitment to pushing one another to become the best versions of themselves that they can be. They are the relationships that endure trials and tribulations but come out on the other side stronger and more confident in their relationship and their faith because their commitment to supporting one another was great than the struggle that they faced.
4. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
"4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;[b]6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never ends."
I have always despised these verses in reference to weddings and dating relationships because the actual translation of love in the original text refers to amicable love, or friendly love. I have always thought it ignorant of people who use these verses in their weddings because the verses refer to friendly love as opposed to romantic love. However, now I see the value in this. Even in dating relationships and romantic relationships, love must be rooted in a friendship. Romantic love encompasses amicable love. Romantic love in a marriage involves all of these things and more. So these verses set the main foundation for a solid and healthy romantic relationship and without this type of love, the quality of relationship is lowered.
5. 1 Peter 4:8
"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins."
Choosing to love someone is a choice and it is often times hard to choose to love someone who has hurt you or disappointed you. It is really hard to forgive and to choose to love instead. Everyone has dealt with losing a friend because someone chose to stop loving. The Bible tells us that love covers a multitude of sins. Choosing to love and embracing that love aids us in forgiveness which aids us in the restoration of friendships and relationships.
6. 1 John 4:18-19
"18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.19 We love because he first loved us."
Perfect love casts out our fears for fear is dealing with punishment and the Lord has given us the opportunity to embrace his grace and be set free from punishment eternally. We are able to love because God first loved us. Setting us up for successful relationships, healthy because of their foundation in God.
This verse has taught me something incredibly important. I have come to realize is that truly solid relationships are found when both people first love God. Once we learn to love God above all, then we are taught to love others. At the center of perfect relationships, there is God.