No one prepares you for when you finally fall into your first love, and it isn't fair. You're blindsided with emotions and the need for their presence and comfort. It's a dramatic change from your independent "I don't need a man" lifestyle, and you end up falling hard and fast. Before you know it, you're changing your relationship status and adding a life event to your timeline. You are officially in a relationship and you are damn proud of it.
You hold on to every feeling and moment, thinking about your new significant other over and over, smiling to yourself. This is the first time you've ever really been in sync with someone and it's like someone finally really gets you—as cliché as it sounds.The honeymoon stage is treating you well and everything is perfect... until it's not.
Things start happening: you really don't like that he flakes out on things sometimes and he starts to feel like you're nagging. But don't fret, love conquers all, right? At least that's what the movies and all our parents' old stories tell us. These things are so little that you both begin to "forget" about them because you love each other. The good outweighs the bad, so you'll deal with the little things.
But time keeps going on and issues get bigger. As you guys get closer and deeper into your relationship, you begin to ask questions and feel a bit doubtful.
"Is this how it's supposed to be?"
"This is not what I expected at all."
You feel like he never listens to you, and he feels like he doesn't get enough attention. Slowly but surely, when you spend time together, it is no longer looking into each others eyes, saying "I love you" and planning your future together. It has become trying to find ways to keep your love alive, trying not to argue, and trying to picture a future together.
At this point you have become immersed into each other's families and have grown to love them like they are your own. He has become a part of your day: the phone call after work, the person you go to for advice, the person you sleep next to almost every night. But the difference now is that you want to do these things less and less. You become distant from each other, begin hiding how you really feel. The future doesn't seem so promising and your path seems to stray away from your relationship.
So what do you do? You've put so much time and effort into one another, they have become your first and deepest love. How do you deal with something like this? This person knows everything about you and has shared his deepest feelings with you too. The connection is undeniable, but it is faltering. No one prepares you for the end of your first love, and it isn't fair.
You have to say goodbye. Say goodbye to the awkward first dates and the craziest ones. Say goodbye to the times you stayed up late together, and the times he held you when you cried. Say goodbye to the arguments and never seeing eye-to-eye.
Appreciate your first love and every experience it has given you. Say goodbye to your first love before you hurt each other, and say hello to the future ahead of you.
