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If You Want Something Done, You Have To Cultivate It Yourself

Any relationship can work, but not each one will: it all depends on each partner's willingness to make it work, and what kind of relationship they cultivate.

Apr 16, 2019

https://pixabay.com/users/366308-366308/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=image&utm_content=408482">Alejandro Tuzzi</a> from <a href="https://pixabay.com/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=image&utm_content=408482">Pixabay</a>

I am absolutely the kind of person who LOVES to talk about her significant other: he's a huge part of my life, one of my best friends, and one of the most wonderful people I know - why wouldn't I talk about him? So I'm going to use this article to shamelessly brag about my him, and give you a few pieces of advice that I've learned:

1. You are allowed to explicitly vocalize the things you do and don't want.

2. You cultivate the culture you want within your relationship.

Honesty is the best policy. It's much easier, to be honest about things than to hope your partner is a mind reader - and honestly, your partner probably isn't a mind reader so the best way to get what you want is to actually say what you want.

For example, I sent my boyfriend the following meme

Twitter screenshot

Obviously, this was me not even trying to be subtle about telling him I wanted him to send me flowers. Well, a few days later...

Flowers from bf

This BEAUTIFUL mixed bouquet showed up on my doorstep and I came home from work to a surprise that filled my heart with love!

I know there's this ridiculous stigma that saying what you want sounds greedy, but being greedy makes you sound greedy - saying what you want makes you sound direct and honest. My boyfriend thanked me for telling him because he said he had wondered if I would like to receive flowers and I took the wonder out of it by giving him an answer to a question he didn't even ask.

So what's the point of this story? Well, first of all - it's an example of me explicitly asking for what I wanted. Second, it is yet another tactic in my effort to cultivate a culture of honesty and open communication within my relationship. If I'm not vocal about what I do and don't want, who's to say my boyfriend would be vocal about what he does and doesn't want? It's pretty much the same as "treat others you want to be treated," - act the way you want your partner to act because if you display the behavior you want to see, your partner will know it is acceptable and therefore (most likely) feel more comfortable acting that way.

Say what you want.

Say what you don't want.

And, if all goes well, your relationship will be defined by honesty and open communication.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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If You Want Something Done, You Have To Cultivate It Yourself

Any relationship can work, but not each one will: it all depends on each partner's willingness to make it work, and what kind of relationship they cultivate.

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No one best represents the struggle like our favorite 90s squad.

1. When course schedules are released and you have a conflict between two required classes.

2. When there is only one section of a popular course.

3. Receiving the 18,000 emails reminding you to register ASAP.

4. When you need to see an advisor, but they are too busy/unresponsive.

5. Trying not to dress like a bum for your appointments with your advisors/department heads.

6. When you have a perfectly planned out schedule, and one class ruins it.

7. Carefully moving things around to accommodate a different class/section.

8. Waking up at 6:00 a.m. for your enrollment time.

9. Concocting a new schedule at your enrollment time after your original plan gets changed.

10. Getting into a class and filling the last available seat.

11. When all of your classes finally go through.

12. Realizing that you forgot a class that was a pre-requisite for everything else.

When your capability of "adulting" is put to the test

Nobody deserves to be living in poverty.

"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."

What is the current minimum wage at the federal level?

What are the benefits of raising the minimum wage?

What are the states that have set a $15/hour minimum wage?

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Because who understands your bitterness better than April?

1. When you have to provide an "interesting fact" for your first day ice-breaker.

2. When your professor is babbling on and on in his lecture.

3. When you edit your friend's paper and they get an A.

4. When it's 2 AM and you remember you have a test tomorrow.

5. When you finish taking the test and you're pretty sure you failed...

6. ...but then you get the test back and somehow passed.

7. When you've been up for 12 hours straight writing a paper.

8. And then you manage to stay awake in class the next day.

9. When you have to butter up your professor for an extra credit opportunity.

10. When you're assigned a group project.

11. And your group-mates are trying to chat about life instead of the assignment.

12. When it's your last class of the day and you're about to go home.

13. But then you remember rent is due tonight and the anger comes back.

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