To My Savior

A thank you letter from the struggling college student

My freshman year of college was both the worst and best of my life. I crashed and burned one week and found myself winning the next. I struggled with money, grades, time management, friends, making my bed, and trudging through the snow. In the end I gained much more than I ever lost or could imagine. The tough times made me stronger and shaped into the independent person I am today. I owe one person everything and no tags person is not my sorority president, professor, advisor, or boyfriend. This is an open letter, relating to all students, thanking the Lord, our savior, for nothing short of our lives and possibly that one good grade last semester in psychology.

Dear God,

I fail you every single day of my life. Often on Monday morning I wake in my stuffy dorm room with an ungrateful heart and snarky attitude. There are nights that I lay beneath my Target comforter and think more of my burdens than the millions of blessings in my reach because in that moment drama was ridiculously more important than my good health. Too often there are times that I find myself in the dark and this is all my own fault. Though I do not purposely cut time short with you I also do not always set aside a period of each day for us to communicate, yet you never stray from my side, though you may allow me to fall, which reminds me just oh how much I need you.

You gave me the rainy walk across campus to class, but you also ensured that I was one of the lucky ones sporting a nice new rain jacket and large umbrella, which also reminds me that I have two loving parents that willingly and happily purchased these items without hesitation. You allow me to stumble and occasionally slip, both literally and figuratively, but each and every time you lift me up and I am once again reconnected with my most precious treasure, which is of course my relationship with you, my savior. You took certain people from my life and slammed frequented doors, yet you blessed me with a group of friends that continue to shower me with love and kindness, which leads me to the conclusion that these people and things were pushed out of my world for a very important reason. Though I may be angry and upset in the mist of all the chaos there always comes a moment of clarity and realization. A moment of peace and comfort. A moment in the not so ideal community shower or doodling at my desk when I should be studying or possibly when I am curled up on the edge of my bed, no matter the location of time this is when my heart is free and I come to see that you are responsible for making me, me. So rather than cry and stomp and gripe, I raise my hands in praise to you. I thank you for all that you have given and continue to do.

Thank you for vanishing my chains of sorrow and despair. Thank you for setting me free from my mistakes, worries, and fears because I now know that none of their things define me. Thank you for shielding me from the pain of this treacherous world to the best of your ability. Thank you for protecting my heart from the start and guiding my mind in the right direction. Thank you for blessing me with much more than I deserve. Thank you for calming my nerves on my history exam, shaping my thoughts on life, and working on me for all of time. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

I feel as if an apology is due for oh so many reasons, though I could never repent enough, I will attempt. I am sorry for allowing myself to backslide and for straying from your plan for me. I am sorry for continually banging on a locked door that you have so obviously closed. I am sorry for taking my amazing bundle of blessings and your wonderful grace for granted. I am sorry, but I will always come back home where I belong.

Sincerely,

The struggling college student

As I reflect on this past year I realize that though there has been lost I am amazingly blessed and if we all dig deep I feel tags most will come to this exact conclusion. The world is not perfect, society is not perfect, politicians are not perfect, you are not perfect, nor am I, but the Lord, our savior, is good to us for all eternity.