Let’s be real, sometimes the truth isn’t pretty. It’s easy to deny how we feel or ignore the truth. However, in the end, it is still the truth. It’s important to have people in your life that will tell you how it is. However, there is a fine line between being brutally honest and just being a jerk. But where is that line?

You’ve probably met people in your life that will say something that comes off awfully rude. Maybe they think they’re telling the truth, but in the real world, there are certain things that you can say, and certain things that you can’t say. When you are telling someone the truth, no matter how brutal it may be, presentation is key. If you want to tell someone the truth, you must say it in a way that will make it easier to hear. For instance, plain criticism is no help, yet constructive criticism can go a long way.

Some people think that if they’re saying the truth, that it is OK. Well, I will be honest, if I were to say whatever was on my mind, I would probably get slapped a lot. Everyone has things they think they should definitely not say in public. It’s normal. But just because you think it is the truth does not mean that it is necessarily appropriate to bring up, or bring up in a certain way.

Like I said earlier, presentation is key. If you tell someone something that you think is the truth, yet present it in a rude way, they’re not going to think that you’re telling the truth. But they may think that you’re just a person who lacks the control to keep their mouth shut.

In reality, there are some things that you shouldn’t say. Maybe you see someone who is a little larger. You don’t go up to them and call them “fat” and think that it is the truth. Maybe they are larger, but that doesn’t change the fact that you are being rude. If you were to say, “hey, I’m afraid your health may lead to some complications down the road…” then give some advice, that would be a lot more helpful than just being blatantly rude.

Just because you are saying whatever is on your mind doesn’t mean that you’re being honest. Just because you think you’re being real and honest doesn’t mean it is right. If you were to talk in a rude manner since your boss treated you unfairly, you could get fired. The real world doesn’t work like that, and when it’s nowhere near being constructive at all, you’re just saying an opinion that is really going to piss people off.

Instead of just saying what you think, first, ask yourself, “is what I want to say helpful?” Make sure that what you’re saying has an easier connotation to being a helpful comment rather than an insensitive and rude comment that may even come off as an insult. If it is a yes, then go for it; if it is a no, then it’s probably best to keep quiet.