First off, you are not the only person who has had it tough. You are also not the only person who is still struggling because of their not so glamorous past. See the thing is, acting as if your past is a reason to make bad choices or treat people however you want, is actually pretty damn selfish. I personally have used my upbringing as an excuse to act out on many occasions, and it has gotten me NOWHERE. You can’t honestly believe that you are the only one that has to deal with some messed up shit, do you?
You need to stop saying things like,
“I can’t commit or talk about my feelings because of my past relationships.”
Or
“I have anger problems because my parents abused me as a child.”
Don’t get me wrong, I understand, I struggled for years dealing with the fact that my biological mother chose drugs over me, or that the countless foster homes I was in emotionally and physically abused me, and I understand that not everyone is strong enough to let it go, and move on. I just believe if you are able to use those excuses as to why you are a certain way, it means you are also acknowledging that you have a problem that you can fix.
Your past does not define who you become!
Remember when we were kids, watching Hannah Montana or Zoey 101, and thinking to ourselves, "I wish I had her life?" Let me tell you a secret, you can! Now maybe you can’t live a double life as a teen pop star, and unless you are Miley Cyrus, your dad is never going to be Billy Ray, but you can be happy. That’s something you get to choose for yourself.
You will never get to hit a rewind button. You will never get to go back to that prominent moment of your life and erase it. You do, however, get to dictate your future. Yes, we have all heard it before, but it’s true. It might be a rough journey getting there, but just like anything in life if you work hard enough at it, and don’t give up, eventually you will reap the rewards.
It’s not going to be easy. You will need to say goodbye to toxic people. You will need to talk yourself into working harder, and you will most likely have to finally admit to yourself that you need professional help or someone to talk to.
Most of all, you will need to believe that YOU are worth fighting for! Stop trying so hard to fight the demons that have chosen you as their host, and instead, let them fight alongside you. You will need your tough past to help mold an even better future. Good luck, YOU GOT THIS!