Since I was a kid, I've always been a romantic. At mass every Sunday when I would sit between my parents, I'd always make them hold hands. It warmed my heart to see the look in their eyes when I did so. I was a Disney Princess who believed in love at first sight. I spent so much of my teenage years searching for my Prince Charming. And I thought, for a second, I just might have found him.
But that's not what happened.
Life happened.
My faux Prince made me realize you can't just skip to the happily ever after. That's one way to get your heart ripped right out of your body.
You just have to let life work itself out.
In college, I found out attachment and love aren't the same thing. Wanting to be around someone all the time and needing to be around someone all the time aren't the same thing. Wanting to find "The One" and just wanting to find someone aren't the same thing. Those are two different feelings entirely.
Recently, I've been more realistic about relationships and enjoying each stage of a blooming relationship, rather than trying to skip to the big kiss. *roll credits*
Romantics tend to over romanticize situations, people, and relationships which can end very badly especially if it ends up being unrequited love. Realists tend to be a bit more pessimistic about finding their soulmate which can make them build walls taller than China's. But it's all about having a healthy mix of the two.
I wear my heart on my sleeve, but also let my head have some say in the matter. Dare I say I have both Sense and Sensibility?
I think there's a third kind of person. A Romantic Realist. I believe in the story, not the ninety minute simple plot line. No, I believe in the nine seasons of heartbreak, rejection, and fun times in between. I believe in the low and the high points all leading up to the epic conclusion. I believe in the real story.
Love isn't about finding someone to spend your life with, it's about how you end up stumbling along them and how they change your life. It's about what happens after the credits roll.
And you can't search for love, love comes to you whether you want it to or not. It's very sneaky that way.
As a romantic, I know I will find my happily-ever-after one day, but as a realist, I know it won't be as easy as the media portrays it. It takes chemistry, timing, and hard work. The universe, God, or whatever ominous being that's in charge of this stuff will put that special someone in my life, but it's up to me to keep them it.
