Whenever I had a boyfriend, I always pictured “The Forever.” Could this be the one? Could I spend the rest of my life with this person? Eventually I learned that not every guy I date is going to be “My Forever” or give me that “forever” feeling.

I dated a guy for 8 months and from the moment him and our first date, I knew he was the one I was going to marry. He and I liked the exact same things and we would finish each other’s sentences. Everything seemed perfect, until it wasn’t. We broke up over a year ago and from then on, I’ve grown to realize that not everyone is going to give you a forever feeling.

Recently, I dated a guy from less than a month. When I first started talking to him, I knew he liked me a lot, but I didn’t necessarily feel the same way. I was flattered and head over heels when he asked me to be his girlfriend. During our time dating, I knew that there was no way we would be able to be together when we went off to school. I did not like him nearly as much as my ex but I kept on telling myself, “this is good for right now.” Unfortunately, the right now became mutual and we realized that it really were weren’t compatible with one another.

Here’s the difference between the two and how “The Right Now” is better.

The Right Now

The right now will help you in the long run.

Do not get your hopes up. Life happens and people will leave for whatever reason, whether they end up not liking you as much, the both of you want different things, or you flat out are just not compatible with each other. The little things that a “forever” would like about someone, just turn annoying.

People will say the right now wastes time.

I disagree. Every life experience, especially dating, is a life lesson. You learn more about yourself and what you want in the end through every guy you date.

It will save you heartbreak.

Do not try to create a forever with someone who you really can’t picture yourself being with for a life time.

The Forever

You will know instantly if you and this person are going to be together forever. There will be no skepticism. You will always feel comfort and reassurance that no matter what happens, you and this person will be together. This person will always love you conditionally and the little things about them, the quirks, the flaws, your things that are imperfect will seem perfect to them.

You’ll will grow and strengthen each other. You will help each other through the rough times and help them change to become a better person they are.