1. "This Salad Quiz Will Reveal Who You Truly Are"

How on earth could the type of salad I or anyone else eats determine who I "truly" am? I'm pretty sure my deep hatred for croutons has nothing to do with my commitment issues.

2. "We Know How Tall You Are"

Is the first question on this quiz "how tall are you"? Because otherwise I highly doubt you know how tall I am. Also, what a commanding statement: "We Know How Tall You Are" -- are you writing this article from inside my house?

3. "Create A Subway Sandwich And We'll Guess Your Dream Job And Age"

This is just baffling to me. If you can seriously tell me what my dream job is based on my Subway order then I am truly amazed. I have no idea what my "dream job" is or what goals I should be setting once I graduate college so if you're telling me a $5 footlong is going to tell me how to live my life I will take it.

4. "Build A Salad and We'll Guess Your Age and Dream Job"

What is it with salads having all of the answers in life? And also why do all of these foods know what my dream job is?

5. "Which Sex Position You Should Try, Based on Your Ice Cream Order"

How? Why?

6. "Surprising Reasons Why You Should Never Ever Dump Old Pickle Juice Down The Drain"

Okay, this is too much. Why would anyone take the time out of their day to write an article solely about the preservation of old pickle juice?