Picture this. 16 year old girl is walking into her first day at her first job at a retail clothing store. She thinks that she's going to be working in an industry that involves selling clothes, but what she has yet to discover is the lessons that it is going to teach her about her own life in the future. Now fast forward to the same girl almost 6 years down the road. 22 years old, still working in the same industry, yet with a new outlook life due to the many circumstances she went through ever those 6 years.
Working in retail, I feel as though I have learned a lot of lessons that span well outside of the realm of selling products and customer service. As I have spent most of my teen years, as well as early adulthood in this industry, I have, over time, gained a different outlook on the way the I view life and the "real world". While I was taught so many different things about people, circumstances, and life itself, there are a few in particular that I feel I have taken and continue to take with me for the rest of my life.
1. People's Perceptions are Their REALITY
This was one of the more difficult lessons I needed to learn earlier on, but did not let it come full circle until just recently. No matter what you think or feel about yourself, if you even accidentally emulate a personality type, another person's perception of what that is then is ultimately their reality. You could be the nicest person in the entire world, yet if you have one single bad day and someone catches you during that day, that is automatically who you are to them. I have had to learn the hard way that people feel very strongly about these perceptions. I caught myself in situations plenty of times where a customer at work would look at me, have an attitude, or ask me if I was okay. Much later I would also see it with the people that would surface in my day to day life as well. At the time I would be confused because I did not feel as though I was acting any type of way. It took until just recently for me to fully realize and understand that I may think that I am not doing anything wrong, but other people are going to see something, and ultimately take those perceptions to create their own reality of you.
2. Not Everyone is Going to Like You
This is one of those lessons that I came across in my everyday life, but was affirmed to this idea as i started my life in the retail world. I was 100% that teenager that really wanted to please everyone that I came in contact with, and wanted to befriend anyone that would let me. The major problem I ran into was the fact that, I never understood why at times others would not be so receptive to this. I would go home and get upset to my parents because, let's be honest guys, people in high school were cruel, and all I wanted was to be someone that could be cool with everyone. It wasn't until I started working, that I realized this idea to its full extent. I remember I was having a problem with a customer one day; no matter what I would do, I just could not make this costumer happy. After she left, my manager pulled me aside and gave me the real talk. She told me that it did not matter how hard I pushed and let people in, there will always be some who will turn away, even if for the reason that they can. This opened my eyes and changed me for the better. While I still strive to be open to everyone and let whoever is willing into my life, I also no longer take it personally when some turn the other cheek.
3. Everyone Has a Story and Circumstance
Growing up, I never really tried extremely hard to understand this. I was very easily offended by other people when they would act negative towards me. Needless to say, this was a huge challenge for me with the industry I chose to work in for so many years. I would have customers coming in that were odd, snappy, rude, and sometimes downright disrespectful. I swear that I would countlessly (and at times still do) complain about these situations that would occur. It wasn't until I had a run in with a customer that I learned to have compassion towards these situations. There was a customer that came into my store and looked extremely frantic. One of my co-workers walked up to me saying that she was being rude to her and wouldn't talk to her. I walked up to customer and just started a conversation. It wasn't until I asked about her day that I found out the reason for her frantic behavior. This situation taught me that everyone has their own story or circumstance, which is a major influence for who they are or their behavior at a time. Although in this instance, the person explained to me the reason for the behavior, that will clearly not always be the case. For me to get offended about that never makes a situation better any way. I learned to live in way that is more compassionate for those because as an individual, I would want the same respect from someone else.
4. Life is a Beautiful Disaster...and the Name of the Game is to Run with it.
Saving the best and most important for last, retail taught me about the beautiful disaster that comes from life. As an individual, I am never afraid to admit that I am at times a stressball and control freak. I have had many times where life experiences pass me by, and all I do is sit and wonder what I could have done to change those circumstances. I never had time to just sit, smell the roses, and run with whatever situation came my way. There are so many times early on in my retail career where a situation would occur, and all I could do was sit and obsess over the things that were further and further out of my control. I could not tell you exactly when but somewhere along the road I finally learned how much I was missing when all of this was passing me by. There are so many situations in work as well as my everyday life that I could sit and obsess over, but then what would that solve? I learned so many things by working in this industry, but if there was one thing that I would point out as the most crucial, it would be the ideals of taking life as it comes, and rolling with the punches of what comes from it. There is no sense in losing your mind over someone who was rude, a co-worker that you didn't get along with, or a shoplifter that got away. While there could be 6 different things going wrong or not the way that they entailed, its that 1 or 2 moments when things go magically right that keep a person going. It's those beautiful moments where I remember why I have stayed in retail so long, and that is because it's worth everything I had to learn along the way. For that I am extremely grateful.
