Being a server is a tough gig. People can be rude and the trays of food are heavy. Not to mention the constant demands being barked at you. So I stopped and thought for a minute and these are the top 17 things I wish my customers knew before sitting down to order:
1. Stop interrupting me before I get through my introduction.
"Hey, guys! My name is Ali and...
"Sweet tea, no lemon."
2. I cannot read your mind.
If you have a seating preference, considering telling us that before we begin to seat you. How was I suppose to know you didn't want to sit by the window.
3. A simple "please" and "thank you," goes a long way.
If you're nice to me, I'll be nice to you.
4. I only have two hands.
Please keep in mind that I only have two hands.
5. Table manners. Learn them.
Just know that when I bring food to your table and you don't move your cell phone or anything out of the way on the table, I'm liable to *purposefully* drop this food on you.
6. Being rude won't get you better food or better service.
Please understand that I am in charge of transporting what you are about to eat and drink. Consider being nice to the person in charge of your dinner.
7. I do not cook your food.
If your food comes out and you aren't pleased with it, do not take it out on me. I DIDNT COOK IT. If you ask nicely, I will gladly send it back and have it remade.
8. I am a human.
Your server is a human; therefore, we make mistakes.
9. No, I did not intentionally screw your order up.
Please do not take it personally when a server messes up your order. Do not act as if it was my personal goal to deprive you of your rolls.
10. I am not your servant.
Yes, I am here to serve you. No, I am not here for you to bark commands at.
11. For the love of all things that are good and holy, do not snap at me.
If you try to get my attention by snapping at me, I will secretly wish for you to choke on those fries.
12. Threatening never to come back does not hurt my feelings.
"We will not be back!" does not, in any shape, form, or fashion, hurt me. If anything, I'm probably relieved.
13. If you can't afford to tip, don't go out to eat.
It's really simple, actually. If you can't afford to tip at least 20% than eat at home or consider fast food.
14. Do not tip your server based on how your food tasted.
Again, I did not cook your food; I served it. Tip me on how well my service was, regardless of the quality of the food.
15. Tipping should not be optional.
And just because it is optional, does not mean you shouldn't tip me.
16. Control your kid.
If you bring a tiny human into a restaurant, please don't let them roam around. Those trays of food are heavy and hot.
17. Kindness goes a long way.
Just have some basic human decency and be kind to your server.