Hey there! Let's just do a quick refresher course on what an opinion really is:
A very quick Google search of the word itself will tell you that an opinion is "a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge." An example of an opinion would be, "I think that yellow is the prettiest color," or, "Breaking Bad is the most entertaining show out there!"
A wide variety of opinions may be formed about any given issue. Ergo, people who adopt different opinions on issues tend to disagree heavily. For example, traditional democrats and traditional republicans often have differing views on whether or not women should have access to safe abortions, and so members of the two parties tend to heatedly debate the issue.
Many individuals have researched and listened well enough about the issue at hand to form an opinion that can withstand healthy debate and discourse. However, every once in a while, when a person feels that his views are being attacked too heavily, he may utter or type the phrase, "Well, that's just my opinion, and you have to respect it."
Okay. Now that I'm done taking you back to the first grade, let me explain why the "Respect my opinion," trope can't fly anymore. (Aside from the fact that saying, "You have to respect my opinion and that's that," is fundamentally synonymous with saying, "I'm out of arguments, I realize that you've got some good counterpoints, but I'm never going to change my mind.")
To begin, I do not have to respect your opinion if it is not even an opinion after all. If your "opinion" consists of false information, then it is not an opinion. Rather, it is what American philosopher Harry G. Frankfurt would call, "bull****," which equates to, "spreading 'facts' that aren't necessarily true while having an utter disregard for the truth." For instance, if your opinion is that "all black people are thugs and murderers," then, first of all, you're a racist, and your opinion isn't the only thing about you that I don't respect. (Hint: it's your entire existence. I don't respect you as a person.) Second, a simple fact check via Google search will prove you wrong in literally seconds. If you did not take the time to, first, make sure that your opinion truly WAS an opinion and not a slew of 'facts,' and, second, double check that the facts you were spewing weren't actually false, then, no; I do not have to respect your opinion. Preaching a blanket statement about a group of people that is clearly false is not an opinion. It's bull****.
Aside from your opinion not actually being an opinion, I do not have to respect your views if there is nothing respectable about them. If your opinion contains racist, sexist, or anti-LGBT slurs, I do not have to respect it. If your opinion shows hatefulness and disrespect directed at me or any of my loved ones, I most definitely do not have to respect it. Respect is given when respect is shown.
*Quick tangent: "Respect is given when respect is shown," is the basis for the reason I have such a problem with the whole, "Respect your elders," rhetoric. Why would I respect an elderly man who has called me a colorful array of names simply because he was alive long enough to ruin my chances of ever buying a house? This isn't to say that I don't respect older people. A lot of older people are super cute, and they show respect and love toward me, so the feeling is mutual. End tangent.*
Basically, if your opinion further damages groups of people that are already marginalized and suffering, then there is nothing honorable about your opinion, and I am under no obligation to show respect to the disrespectful views that have just exited your mouth or keyboard.
Yes, I can hear the naysayers now: "So you won't respect another person's opinion if the opinion is different than yours?" That is not what I'm saying at all. Had I a Muslim friend who wears a hijab, I would most certainly respect her right to wear her beautiful hijab, even though I am not Muslim, and I have never worn a hijab. Had I a friend who liked to eat mushrooms on his pizza, I would respect his right to eat said mushroom pizza because his act of consuming mushrooms is not hurting anyone. Even though it is nasty. (That was an example of an opinion, for those still not following.)
Lastly, most of the time that I have an argument with you, I am respecting your right to have an opinion. However, you fail to see this fact because, at the end of our argument, I still disagree with you. "Respect my opinion," does not equal, "Agree with me; I am right." If your opinion truly is an opinion (and not a bunch of false facts), and my opinion is truly an opinion, then neither of us is correct. You say that spaghetti is a lovely Italian dish; I say that it's gross and I can't even watch another person eat it. Neither of us is correct; we accept the fact that people have different palates, I respect your love of spaghetti, and we move on. Just because I disagree with you does not mean that I am not respecting your opinion. The fact of the matter is that you cannot say, "You aren't respecting my opinion," when you don't get the opposing side to transform their beliefs.
Essentially, all I'm trying to say is that if you want others to respect your opinion, form an opinion worth respecting.
