One of the most important things we are taught when we are little is respect. We are taught to respect people, opinions, and most importantly, our elders. But, what happens if our “elders” are disrespectful to us? Are we, as younger people, just supposed to sit back and not say anything? Are we just supposed to take the disrespect as if we’re supposed to? Why is it disrespectful to say something back to an adult if what the adult said made you feel disrespected? We’re not taught respect when we are little; we are taught to tolerate disrespect.

There have been many times in my life where I’ve been disrespected by adults and some of these instances have even been my own parents. I’ve been disrespected by a few teachers and, now, even a professor. When I was younger, I thought adults weren’t disrespectful because they were the ones teaching respect. I realized that adults can be disrespectful to children too.

I’ve also witnessed other youths be disrespected by adults. The first major instance was in middle school. My principle actually dragged a kid out of the room by their shirt. Another instance was when the counselor grabbed a kid by the neck. Now, if these two instances aren’t prime examples of disrespect, I don’t know what is. No matter what the kids did, those two adults had no right to put their hands on them.

There were also instances in high school where a teacher has disrespected a student. The student wasn’t allowed to defend themselves because they would be called “disrespectful”. Even in families, disrespect between adults and children take place. There have been many times were my mother has said disrespectful things to me and I couldn’t “talk back” to her. It seems as though once a child becomes an adult, then they are allowed to defend themselves. This shouldn’t be the case. As children, we should be taught that if we are disrespected, we need to speak up for ourselves. We shouldn’t be taught to tolerate disrespect from adults.

One of the most recent examples of an adult being disrespectful to someone younger was a professor I had in my second semester of college. This professor would bang on the tables if we didn’t answer a question immediately. When she asked the class who had done the homework, she would ask person to person but for some kids she would go, “well, I know you didn’t do it, obviously.” What if that kid actually did have the homework for that day? This professor had no sense of personal space, either. She would hover over students and constantly ask “Are you doing your work?” when she saw that the student was clearly trying to write something. One time, a student was trying to ask her a question about an assignment and she said, “I’m done talking about it and I can gladly escort you downstairs.” I wonder how she learned respect when she was younger.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a parent, teacher, professor or even the president. Just because you are an adult, does not give you a free pass to be disrespectful to people who are younger than you. Respect goes both ways. A kid trying to explain why they feel disrespected by an adult is not “talking back”, it’s called standing up for yourself. Instead of teaching kids to “respect their elders” we should be teaching kids that elders need to respect younger people as well.