Relationships are a very complex concept to wrap your mind around. I find it hard sometimes to imagine being with someone for so long that you can finish their sentences. In a society that is so wrapped around physical attraction and sexual desire, it is hard to filter out what someone really wants in a relationship that doesn't involve just having sex. Relationships seem difficult at first, but it simplifies over time.
I wanted to know how couples that have been married or together for 25+ years made it work for so long. In a generation of hook-ups, one-night stands, and plentiful cheating, I sought to know what makes a relationship work for so long other than just the physical attributes.
1. Spiritually
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I know when you first hear spiritually you think religion, but that is not always the case. Being spiritually in sync with your partner is good in keeping both your spirits up for the duration of your relationship. Being able to vibe with each other through the ups and downs goes a long way in keeping the relationship healthy.
2. Mentally
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This may be number two on the list, but I believe that it is the most important part of keeping a relationship working even above physical attributes. If your mind is set on other things than wanting your relationship to work, then it won't work.. No matter how hard you try to do the other three things on this list you will never be satisfied if your mind is not into it. You will always be left wanting more or thinking that there should be more coming out of the relationship. Mindset is key in a working relationship.
3. Collectively
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Everyone likes to talk about percentages when it comes to the role that two people play in a relationship. My opinion is to stop looking at percentages and look at the effort that both parties are putting in. It should be a 50/50 effort rather than half of mine is yours. Splitting material possessions is okay to do if that is what you choose to do, but if one person is putting more effort than the other to keep the relationship working it will become evident eventually. It takes two people to row a boat forward if not the boat is going to turn left or right forever.
4. Financially
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Money can't buy you happiness or solely keep a relationship working, but the reason that it is on this list is because, as the elephant in the room, it needs to be addressed. Being financially stable and smart with your money decisions is key in a relationship due to the fact you aren't supporting for just one anymore. It is good to prioritize money in the early stages of your relationship to build a foundation of what the green means to both of you. Money may be the root of all evil, but it doesn't have to be the reason your relationship doesn't work or not.
A relationship may start because of the physical attraction that sets you off to a person, but a relationship will never last just on physicality.
Don't just fall in love with the way they look. Fall in love with who they are.
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