Disclaimer: You're going to get hurt. You're going to get hurt more than once. It won't suck any less.
I know she's been waiting to hear this from me, but I wish I would've listened to my mom sooner when she told me, "It might be the first time but it won't be the last." It may have taken me a few too many years, tears and failed relationships to admit this (you're welcome), but I'm literally 20 years old. I'm allowed to have fun, regret some choices and learn from my mistakes because when else in my life am I going to have the time to do this? One day you'll look around and realize you're financially, emotionally and mentally stable and you can't use your "college years" as a landing pad for your decisions anymore. College is an immensely eye-opening, wild and enriching part of your life and once these years are gone, they're gone. You can't get a do-over or a restart. It will never happen the same way again with these people, in this place, going through whatever you're going through in this moment. Rather than fearing that, or finding some way to make them last forever, cherish them now.
Hurting isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. You've given yourself the chance to feel- or if you're like me, feel really deeply- and that takes courage. Not everything is going to go your way 100% of the time, but college is a learning experience in SO many ways. You find yourself, your bridesmaids, and maybe the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with. You'll also discover your passion(s), your motivation to get out of bed every day, your beliefs, and your values. Don't beat yourself up for getting in over your head with someone totally wrong for you, or befriending someone who turned out to be more than toxic. You're growing, and these things will all become life lessons one day to reflect upon or pass on to someone who needs to hear it the most. "Let your past make you better, not bitter."
It's hard being a girl who pretends to feel too little but actually feels too much. The world we live in has told us it's easier to feel nothing at all and carry on with your life and that being vulnerable is just about equivalent to self-destruction. I'll never regret feeling as much as I do, even for people who don't deserve my energy, because as much as it seems like the world is ending in the moment, I know I'm stronger than anything I'll go through. Chalk it up as an experience, and move along. I may not know what's going to happen tomorrow or the day after, but that's okay with me.
I'll leave you with lyrics from one of my favorite artists. Seriously. Go check him out.
"Although I guess if I knew tomorrow, I guess I wouldn't need faith,
I guess if I never fell, I guess I wouldn't need grace,
I guess if I knew His plans, I guess He wouldn't be God." - Jon Bellion
