So, it is currently 11:05 pm and of course, my mind is going a mile a minute just thinking about what I should write.
I'll be honest, I'm kind of nervous to post this.
But, that's never stopped me before.
Here goes...
It has been quite evident to most ages between young teens through early twenty year old's to be dating and eventually getting married. And although most of my twenty-something year old friends are engaged or have gotten married, I have contemplated a lot about my own singleness. For a minute, I thought that being single was embarrassing. Maybe I felt embarrassed because, in my mind, getting married by a certain age was seeminglyideal.
I mean, that is the norm, right?
Anyway, entering my 20th birthday single this year allowed me to do some real soul-searching and self-evaluation that was nonetheless essential. I thought about EVERYTHING that I have accomplished and all the things that are way more important in life than dating (ex. volunteering, serving others, becoming a better individual, and bettering my relationship with the Lord).
This might not sound groundbreaking moment for you readers, but it certainly was for me. The groundbreaking resolution I discovered: date and live with intention. Regardless of the situation, the decisions I make today will impact my future.
Not only this, but I have grown to intentionally avoid heartbreak or toxic relationships. No, I am certainly not always correct in detecting the right person (sorry, but my cupid detector is not always 100% accurate). But that's just the reality of how past toxic relationships and heartbreak can impact the way we perceive ourselves, and those we place in our lives.
Casually dating never caught my attention mainly because, dating without intentionality or purpose, trigger zero interest.
'
You know you are intentionally seeking love when:
You are searching for commitment. Let's be real, if you're casually dating, chances are you won't find a partner who wants to commit. Apparently today's hook-up culture has distorts the way we perceive commitments as well. But, if you're really seeking a committed relationship (from both sides of the relationship), you want to date with more of a purpose.
You are extremely exhausted from settling. Alright, so you have standards --- nothing is wrong with that! In fact, it is better to know what you want out of a relationship before you even enter into one! This is not to say that you need to be PICKY, rather, be cautious and guard your heart. You don't have to let anyone into your life that your heart or mind is telling you otherwise.
You are willing to be patient in the dating arena. Chances are, you probably won't find the woman or man of your dreams on the first date, and that's completely O.K. Your willingness to get back into the dating world means so much more than giving up on love in general. In fact, God calls us to love one another because, to love is to show the glory of and to God. That's a beautiful thing! Just like God has been infinitely patient with you, be patient for waiting on the one that God is preparing for you.
It is incredibly worth it.
You dream of settling-down with the right person. It is one thing to say you want to settle down and get married, and it's another to actually act on it. So, act wisely. Don't just talk- the-talk, but show that you genuinely mean what you say. The Lord does not call us to sit still, He calls us to act and think courageously and trustingly through Him.
You long for a purposeful/meaningful relationship. You have gone through countless breakups and are tired of the end result. Just remember, you are in the driving seat, so be honest with your feelings and your partner's. So, seek guidance from the Lord and ask Him which direction to take in finding the person God has waiting for you!
In close, just remember:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs." - 1 Corinthians 13:4-5.
