When I hear the word “relationship,” I think of true love and commitment.
I think of two people who cannot be without each other.
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Lately, I have noticed that not everyone sees relationships the same way. To some, a relationship is just messing around, or pretending to like each other for the sake of the label.
This damages the integrity of the word. It causes others to doubt the legitimacy and seriousness of your relationship- simply because many other relationships aren’t sincere.
Since I hit puberty, I have had my own definition for “relationship.” I understood that at the heart of one in a relationship is love and devotion. Sure, like all of my peers, I looked forward to finding my person.
But not once, did I consider rushing into a relationship.
In today’s society, there is immense pressure to be in a relationship. From couples dominating most TV commercials to parents relatives furiously asking “So, meet anyone yet?”
It seems that not many people are encouraging self-love or the celebration of being single. Those almost always have to come from within. And, when you reveal your single status, most people do not squeal with excitement. Instead, they offer sympathies such as “That’s OK! You’ll find the one soon!”
Now, when I was single, and someone said such a thing to me, I would respond with, “I know, but I am in no hurry. He will come along when he comes.”
OK, so this may come across as arrogant but that is by no means my intention. Over the years, I have met many interested guys. I was asked to enter a relationship with some of them after only talking for a couple of weeks.
Sure, it was extremely tempting. I had never been in a relationship before, and wanted nothing else than to be someone’s boyfriend. But I would take a moment to think, and understand the ridiculousness of the situation.
Did I truly love them? Did I see myself with them for the rest of my life?
No.
So I would move on, without a second thought or regret.
To me, a relationship is much more than a label or status symbol. It should be for you and your significant other, not friends or family. You should call someone your boyfriend or girlfriend because you truly love them, not because you want the glam of a relationship.
But this is hard. Doing so takes an incredible amount of confidence and self-love. You need to be able to look at yourself and say, “Damn, I’m going to make someone very lucky one day,” not “Why am I still single?”
Think about it. Rushing into a relationship may not seem too bad at the time. Perhaps the first week goes swimmingly well. But what about after three weeks? Or a month?
Rushing into a relationship will cause you more pain than happiness. The fall will be harder and the road ahead rockier. It will discourage you from entering future relationships, for you will constantly compare them to your previous ones.
Currently, I am in a relationship. It is my first and we have been dating for almost four months. I could not be any happier with waiting, because to me, the labels mean little to nothing at all.
It frustrates me when people doubt my relationship. They do so either because it is my first relationship, or because others have destroyed the integrity of the word. However, I have learned to stand tall, and refuse to let their words crush me.
I am head over heels in love with my boyfriend, and that is not changing anytime soon.
It’s time to redefine what it means to be in a relationship.
