I always thought happiness was affiliated with perfection. I confused making plans minute-by-minute, for what a good day truly is. I mistook getting out of work a little earlier than I was supposed to, for what freedom feels like. What was happiness to you before you defined it for yourself?
Sometimes it's a few things that come together to work out to exactly how you want them to. Sometimes it's the little unexpected things like a note your mom left on the kitchen counter before she left for work, or a call from your sister when she lets you know she still needs your guidance- despite her belief that she knows everything there is to know about life. Sometimes it's an "I'm proud of you" that comes from your dad, when he acknowledges your hard work- and also sees the lack of credit you've received. It could be getting the homework you've felt hanging over your head all weekend, done before the hour it's due.
Happiness could be kisses on your forehead from someone who loves you, or driving with the windows down on a sunny, seventy-five degree weather day. It could be laying in your pajamas all day while rain splashes against your window. Happiness could be defined in so many little ways. It's hearing "I love you," and believing it, putting in hard work, and watching it pay off. It's letting your hair blow around in the car and not having to worry about what you look like when you reach your destination. It's road trips, and paydays, and dancing barefoot with the person you love.
Happiness is scoring the winning run, cheering your high school football team on under Friday Night Lights. It's the pulse of your heart during your first kiss. It's coming home to puppy kisses, a family who loves you, and a bed to sleep in. Happiness is the way someone smiles when you give them a gift you know is perfect for them. Happiness is watching someone doing something or talking about something they're passionate about. It's outside country concerts, it's holding hands with the one you love on the coldest of days, and still feeling warm. It's wine nights with your girlfriends, laughing so hard you cry, and it's receiving a package earlier then it's delivery date.
Happiness is perfect winged eyeliner, heels that don't hurt your feet, and it's the summer hits of the 2000's Pandora station. It's pretty throw pillows, cozy blankets, and Ugg slippers. It's meeting a friend for the first time and knowing they're going to be in your life for a long time.
Have you stopped for a minute and thought about what happiness is to you? Or are you resisting to smile at your ex best friend when you pass her on your way to class? Are you pouting over the fact that your boyfriend overslept, missed your date, and still isn't awake after 10 calls and 15 texts? Or is it your mom? Are you angry at her for not allowing you to drain your bank account on an outfit for tomorrow's party? Stop for a minute. Breathe in, breathe out. Let it go.
We need to learn to appreciate the little things that bring us our happiness. We need to embrace these things, these feelings, these moments when we're experiencing them. We let our bad days become bad months, and sometimes even bad years. But what we don't realize is that we don't need to wait for a New Year's Eve celebration to declare it's time to lose the weight that makes us so unhappy. We don't need a day to mark the official beginning of dropping toxic relationships, people, and habits.
We need to learn that happiness is different for all of us in this life, and it's never too late to find it. We too often do not appreciate the things that lighten our loads, brighten our days, and bring smiles to our faces. We need to stop waiting because our happiness is here, it is now, and it is yours.