What is a 'Family?' | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

What is a 'Family?'

Looking past the dictionary definition of the word.

18
What is a 'Family?'
Unsplash

I remember the day as a little kid that it dawned on me that the defining quality of an aunt or uncle was the fact that they were the sibling of one of my parents.

"Okay, wait." I said to my mom to clarify. "But uncle Ricardo and aunt Lele aren't either of your siblings, right?."

"Exactly. They're not actually your aunt and uncle, just your aunt and uncle by marriage."

That perplexed me, because I had never thought about it that way.

What confused me even more when I asked why another aunt of mine, who is not married and not the sister of either of my parents, is called my aunt. My mom then told me that my aunt had come to live with my grandparents at sixteen to help take care of their three kids, one of them being my dad. Since then all of the kids including my dad have looked at her as a sister.

To add to that, I realized the man I called grandpa was not actually the father of either of my parents although he was married to my grandma.

As a kid, that was a lot to process. It was when I realized I had just lumped a bunch of people I loved into a general group called 'family' without actually placing them in any kind of logical hierarchy.

Fast forward a couple of years when my mom's sister moved to Massachusetts where I lived, and we finally got to meet her husband. For the first couple of months he would refer to us as 'Vanessa's nieces,' which thoroughly confused me. I knew he wasn't blood related to me, but I never really cared to make the distinction. My mom, on the other hand, had always referred to my cousins on my dads side as 'my nieces.'

My grandpa had also gotten remarried to an incredible woman who I met for the first time at fifteen. Although I hadn't grown up calling her grandma, I realized when I met her that she deserved to be loved and admired by our family for all that she had done for my grandpa, and for her kind spirit. So I decided to make the effort to call her grandma, and although it was weird at first it eventually stuck.

I've realized throughout the years that I have trouble limiting family to actual genetics, and I don't particularly want to. Sometimes people cross the line of friendship and become so close to your heart that they then become part of your family. I've seen it happen even within my own friends. Occasionally my mom will ask about one of my friends that she hasn't seen in a while because she knows they are like a sister to me and even she misses them.

Those are the friendships I like to make: non-superficial, substantial, and long-lasting. Friendships I know I'll have for the rest of my life because they've become like family and they have seen all sides of me and continue to love me just the same. Any other kind of friendships just aren't worth holding onto.

I've come to realize I love my little family, the actual blood-related part of it and the people who snuck their way in. To add to that, I hope it continues to grow. I welcome the thought of meeting new people with diverse backgrounds who are compassionate and kind and bring light to new areas of my life. Until then, I've got a pretty solid group of people who have my back.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

15 Times Michael Scott's Life Was Worse Than Your Life

Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1209
Michael Scott
NBC

Most of the time, the world's (self-proclaimed) greatest boss is just that, the greatest. I mean, come on, he's Michael Freakin' Scott after all! But every once in a while, his life hits a bit of a speed bump. (or he actually hits Meredith...) So if you personally are struggling through a hard time, you know what they say: misery loves company! Here are 15 times Michael Scott's life was worse than your life:

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

12 Midnight NYE: Fun Ideas!

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

16117
Friends celebrating the New Years!
StableDiffusion

When the clock strikes twelve midnight on New Year's Eve, do you ever find yourself lost regarding what to do during that big moment? It's a very important moment. It is the first moment of the New Year, doesn't it seem like you should be doing something grand, something meaningful, something spontaneous? Sure, many decide to spend the moment on the lips of another, but what good is that? Take a look at these other suggestions on how to ring in the New Year that are much more spectacular and exciting than a simple little kiss.

Keep Reading...Show less
piano
Digital Trends

I am very serious about the Christmas season. It's one of my favorite things, and I love it all from gift-giving to baking to the decorations, but I especially love Christmas music. Here are 11 songs you should consider adding to your Christmas playlists.

Keep Reading...Show less
campus
CampusExplorer

New year, new semester, not the same old thing. This semester will be a semester to redeem all the mistakes made in the previous five months.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

Let's face it, last semester you woke up with enough time to brush your teeth and get to class and even then you were about 10 minutes late and rollin' in with some pretty unfortunate bed head. This semester we will set our alarms, wake up with time to get ready, and get to class on time!

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The 5 Painfully True Stages Of Camping Out At The Library

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

3366
woman reading a book while sitting on black leather 3-seat couch
Photo by Seven Shooter on Unsplash

And so it begins.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

Camping out at the library is not for the faint of heart. You need to go in as a warrior. You usually have brought supplies (laptop, chargers, and textbooks) and sustenance (water, snacks, and blanket/sweatpants) since the battle will be for an undetermined length of time. Perhaps it is one assignment or perhaps it's four. You are motivated and prepared; you don’t doubt the assignment(s) will take time, but you know it couldn’t be that long.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments