The definition of reciprocate is to respond to a gesture or action by making a corresponding one. Some of you may be wondering why I defined this simple term. That reason is because countless people, especially in this generation, don't appear to comprehend the importance of reciprocity. Whether you're in a romantic relationship or building a close friendship, there needs to be an equal effort from both parties.
One of the reasons it's difficult to make new friends is because some people aren't as responsive to you as you'd like them to be. In many instances, you may find yourself constantly reaching out to someone to try and hang out in order to get to know them better, or grab lunch and catch up if it's someone you've known for some time. If you really want to attempt to meet with said person, then it's alright to put in that extra effort and contact them a little more than they do you. After all, some people don't intentionally ignore you or flake out consistently; sometimes schedules conflict or the individual may have less free time on their hands. However, if this person really wants to be your friend, they won't avoid you forever. That being said, if you've been trying to see someone for months with no progress, then I'd suggest moving on to people who will actually make the effort to see you. Here's my rule: if I ask you to hang out but you can't or cancel last minute, than it should be your turn to contact me the next time to make a plan or vice versa. A real friend won't continuously flake out and expect you to do all the rescheduling.
When it comes to dating and relationships, reciprocated effort is essential for the growth of the relationship. Compare dating to the difficulties of making a friend, only way more complicated. A lot of men and women are old fashioned when it comes to the "rules of dating." For example, men are often expected -- as well as eager -- to pay for dates. I do agree that paying for a first date makes a good impression; however, I'm just as content with splitting the check. It's only the first date, so there's no rush in uncovering his financial status. As a woman, paying for the date after they've payed for the last one is a nice gesture. I mean, guys shouldn't have to do all the work, right? No. So whether you're a male or female, how about putting in the same amount of effort your potential lover gives you? If the boy or girl you're dating doesn't put in the effort to go out with you, then consider the same rule you'd apply to a "friend:" move on and date someone who is actually interested in getting to know you.
Some say in every relationship, one partner will always love the other more -- in other words, two people cannot love each other equally. Whether this theory is true, I have yet to determine, but I do know when it's completely clear two people in a relationship don't express the same amount of love and respect for each other, there's an issue (whether the couple is aware of it or not). When I say "express love," I don't necessarily mean display affection. Some people aren't as touchy-feely as others and that's totally normal as long as you know your other half cares as much as you. Don't let your boyfriend or girlfriend plan all your romantic outings or surprise you with gifts without returning the kindness. Remember not to take this out of context; if your partner is more financially stable, then it's understandable if you can't afford to shower them with gifts like they may you. However, you don't always have to spend a lot of money to surprise your significant other. Sometimes keeping it simple with a drive to the beach or movie tickets will suffice. If you feel you're not getting the love you deserve, talk about it in a non-confrontational manner. If things don't improve, don't settle. Know your worth.
The bottom line is every relationship requires 50 percent effort on both ends. Not 20/80 and certainly not 10/90, but 50/50. The amount of effort put into relationships will ultimately show how much a person truly cares.
