My name is Erin, I'm 23 going on 87. I like my wine and my bedtime is approximately 10 p.m. Snap Chat is annoying and I constantly have to ask others what things mean - I text my roommate daily to find learn new slang terms. Maybe I just don’t understand, or I am behind the times, but when you use the following terms I have no idea what you mean. And most likely, so does no one else. Please, do us all a favor and remove the following from your vocabulary. Also, I know some of these aren't sayings but just play along.
1. Fleek.
WTF does this even mean??? Congrats that you colored in your eyebrows. Are you proud of anything else going on in your life?
2. Lit.
NO. Just don’t ever say this. Literally EVER. Your Fam is not lit, neither was the frat party, or your trip to Vegas with your parents. The only thing that is lit is the match you see above...
3. Toasted.
Like you're toasty warm? You want to become toasty like a s'more? Is this a verb, noun, or an adjective? I'm confused.
3. Low-key.
Do we also say high-key? Why are you low-key kind of upset? Just kidding, don’t answer that. Also, how do you spell that? Dash or no dash?
4. Fire Emoji.
Are you at a bonfire? Then please stop.
5. Dope.
This wasn’t cool in 2010 and it’s not cool now so just do us all a favor and stop using it.
6. Juice?
I heard this in a song. It either means, a) you would like some orange juice or b) most likely something very illegal. Either way it sounds stupid, so you should probably never use it in real life (IRL).
7. Hit.
As in, “did they hit?” . That’s what this means and you sound disgusting while saying it.
8. When you stand on one leg in EVERY photo.
Are you a flamingo? If so, continue. If not, STOP IT! This is cute in some photos, but girl, change it up every now and then with your poses.
9. Slay.
You should only be allowed to say this when referring to Beyoncé. No one else is worthy.
10. Fam/Squad
The only acceptable time to use Fam is if you refer to the same “Fam” every time you use it. Not everyone is “Fam” and don’t call me “Fam” either. Squad is only acceptable if you're Taylor Swift or if you are actually a part of her girl squad
11. When you “boyfriend” pose with literally every guy that you take a photo with.
You know, when you have you hand on his chest. This is fine, this is cute. But it's only cute when you do it with your boyfriend. When you pose like this with EVERY guy that you take a picture with you look desperate. Also, I should be able to tell the difference between your boyfriend, your brother, your dad, and your guy friends. Stop hanging all over everyone.
Please stop saying and doing all of these ridiculous things, and see how your life will benefit from it! Trust me, we will all thank you for it!
P.S. I'll work on keeping up with the hip lingo and pushing my bed time back to 10:30.