I've found myself over the years questioning my worth due to the fact that I have never had a lasting significant other in high school, which then continued into college... I used to make myself miserable thinking of every possible reason as to why I was alone while all of my friends were in relationships, but I realized as time went on, it's not something to be upset or embarrassed about. It's actually something to be thankful for and here's why!
1. First and probably most important, ALONE TIME.
I cannot explain to you how important it is to find yourself. Find yourself while you are young, so you can live your life doing and being around people that you genuinely enjoy being around. College is seriously the PERFECT time to finally focus on YOU. Instead of being worried about why the cute guy or girl in your philosophy class won't talk to you anymore, worry about you. Find your interests, hobbies, likes, and dislikes. Now is the time to be completely selfish and find out more about YOU not only for your own benefit but also for the benefit of the future people that will come into your life. As cliché as it is, "Your vibe attracts your tribe." Save yourself the petty friendships that don't seem to ever last. Find yourself and others will find you. Plus, before you know it we are going to walking across the stage at graduation and stepping straight into the real world so it's important that you are a boss a$$ bih alone that way when the right person comes, you and that person will thrive.
2. Uh Idk if you weren't already aware but... college is hard.
It's hard enough alone so I can only imagine the stress others go through trying to schedule time to see their significant others. It shouldn't be like that. These are my opinions but I truly believe that love should come naturally. It shouldn't be forced. I shouldn't have to change around my entire schedule just to see my S/O. While I definitely believe it's important to make time to see and spend time with the people you care about, I also think its important to be completely invested in your studies. No, I don't mean you can't push off some homework so you can go on a dinner date but there's a line that needs to be drawn between social life and academic life. If you truly want to succeed in college and receive the grades you want, you have to want it more than you want a relationship (that tbh probably won't last anyway because us girls and guys in college all have a lot of things going on so when people try to combine the two it tends to get messy). So just save yourself the stressy messy depressy times and again, focus on you! And your studies!!! I'm not saying you shouldn't have fun and you shouldn't meet people and try new things but just remember to draw the line between what you want versus what you NEED. Keep your focus on the future!
3. "Good things come to those who wait."
I know, another corny cliché but it's a cliché for a reason! I mentioned earlier that I used to beat myself up for not being like other girls and for not having been in a relationship like they had. I convinced myself that I wasn't good enough for anyone until one day I told myself I was MORE than good enough. You really have to believe that YOU are good enough if you want others to believe you are. Confidence is attractive to people. Be you and OWN IT!!!! People admire others that are in touch with themselves and apparently it helps in relationships... I clearly wouldn't know LOL. I might not be an expert but I feel like I have witnessed and experienced some messy things when it comes to trying to date in college. Everyone is kinda in the same boat of not knowing what they want, so give yourself time to figure out what you want and wait for something magical to come along. They say there's someone out there for everyone, right? Your someone will come you just have to be patient, at least that's what everyone tells me... Have fun. Go on dates with whoever, meet new people, just remember to take care of yourself and also remember that at the end of the day it's just a silly college girl/boy, your soulmate will make you forget about all those horrible dates you went on and all those time you were ghosted (it's OK we've all been there).
So, next time you find yourself feeling unworthy of being loved remember to love yourself instead. Be there for you. At the end of the day, no one is going to have your back like you do so treat yourself nicely!!! You deserve it! You are worthy of being loved, so don't let other people who don't know what they want upset you and just remember to ask yourself... Is this really worth it?
If it's not going to matter in 3 months, let it go. You got this, love!!!
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