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10 Reasons You’re The Girl Who ALWAYS Has Gum, No Matter What

Coffee breath is a monster that must be contained.

Katie Coviello

Jul 30, 2018

Villanova University

2298

10 Reasons You’re The Girl Who ALWAYS Has Gum, No Matter What

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I chew gum when I'm working, when I'm at the gym, after I eat, and probably any other time that I'm not eating or sleeping (though I have totally fallen asleep with gum in my mouth - sorry mom!). It's a habit that I can't kick, and honestly, I'm not trying to any time soon (sorry dentists everywhere!)...

1. Coffee. Breath.

Giphy

Look, it's a common, well-known fact that coffee, our sweet, sweet sleepy savior, has fumes that could knock you dead if you get too close to someone who has just downed their venti-fix. No one likes coffee breath (or really any breath that smells like your leftovers).

2. Stress management

Giphy

As a highly stressed individual, gum has a (i'm convinced) magical ability to relieve my stress and provide me with unadulterated focus. Need to study? Whip a pack of those bad boys and you'll be ready to ace an exam before you know it.

3. Anxiety, who?

Giphy

Similar to stress, whenever I am nervous or anxious (so, basically all the time), I find that chewing gum can actually help me calm down and sort out whatever I'm feeling. So, basically, it's free therapy and I love free things.

4. You never know when the ~mood~ strikes

Giphy

Listen, I'm not saying I run around and kiss boys all the time but like you seriously never know when the opportunity will strike and who wants to make out with someone with bad breath? If you answered "I do!" than you are probably a serial killer, sorry.

5. The cool factor

Giphy

At some point in your life you wanted to look effortlessly cool popping bubbles with your gum or twirling it around on finger like Cher and honestly I'm still trying to achieve that level of coolness okay?

6. Nausea Ninja

Giphy

Okay, I think there's some actual voodoo magic in gum because if I ever feel sick to my stomach, gum always helps cure nausea and that is the kind of support that I need.

7. Snack city

Giphy

Whenever i'm hungry and don't have a snack on hand (rare) I can always count on a piece of gum to tide me over until my next meal.

8. Caffeine boost

Giphy

Tired? Chewing a piece of minty gum will wake you, and your senses, right up. Trust me, I'd know.

9. It can whiten your teeth

Giphy

So, personally, I think teeth whitening gum is probably a myth but why wouldn't I at least try and keep those teeth pearly white?

10. Old. Habits. Die. Hard.

Giphy

Probably the number 1 reason you will always see me with gum is because it is a habit that I simply can not kick, nor do I want to. Everyone wants to be your friend AND you have great breath AND it reduces stress/ anxiety?! Yeah, sign me up.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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10 Reasons You’re The Girl Who ALWAYS Has Gum, No Matter What

Coffee breath is a monster that must be contained.

In This Article:

1. Coffee. Breath.

2. Stress management

3. Anxiety, who?

4. You never know when the ~mood~ strikes

5. The cool factor

6. Nausea Ninja

7. Snack city

8. Caffeine boost

9. It can whiten your teeth

10. Old. Habits. Die. Hard.

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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